PREVIOUSLY ON AMC
Adam: "It'd be in the baby's best interest if Arlene stays here." Hayley: "With the two of us watching you, you're going to wish you had used birth control."
Greenlee: "We're not finished." Ryan: "Yes we are, Greenlee. We're finished. Do you understand that? We're dead."
Jake to Gillian: "You and Ryan were married, I know, but there are still feelings between you, just as there are still feelings between you and me.
[NOTE: I notice that Gillian's voice suddenly goes "normal" lately when she is saying something particularly heartfelt, as opposed to "actressy". Hayley is doing that lately, too, as well as Arlene. Must be a new director in town]
CHANDLER LIVING ROOM
Liza stands in the doorway to the living room and says she thought Arlene would be gone by now. Arlene says a package arrived, special delivery. Liza tells her to take her package and leave and Arlene counters that Adam has a big investment in it -- it's sort of like a joint venture. Liza scoffs at the idea of Adam being in business with Arlene: "Is she drunk?" Arlene says she's off the sauce, doctor's orders. She informs Liza that the doctor did a blood panel with surprising results. Liza: "Liver shot?" She doesn't care about Arlene's medical problems. Arlene says it's not a problem, it's a blessing. She starts to tell Liza about the baby, but Adam interrupts her at the last second, telling her that he and Liza have a date. Arlene blinks for a couple of seconds, then says okay and breezes off to see Hayley to do a little mother/child bonding. Adam glowers at her. Liza wonders what THAT was all about and Adam says she doesn't want to know. She questions the "joint venture" and tells Adam to give Arlene whatever amount of money she wants -- anything to just get RID of her because Liza, Adam and Colby should be together. Adam smiles. Liza says she wants that right now -- she doesn't want to wait. They kiss passionately.
Later on, the camera pans around the living room to them, still standing there kissing. [As the top of the stuff on the bar comes into view, I wonder why there are what appear to be 4 bottles of medicinal grade Listerine to the right of the crystal decanters] They break the suction and tell each other that they've waited all their lives for this and that their life until now has been hell on earth. He asks if she forgives him. She says: "Love forgives everything. And I love you very much." [I wonder if this means she has a terminal disease and if they are going to make snow-angels and have hot chocolate before he takes her to the hospital to die] Adam inhales deeply and savors her saying she loves him. Liza talks about how, when they were apart, she was prideful, angry and frustrated and she had no joy in her life [what's Colby, chopped liver? Grated cheese?] She wants it to be like it used to be [Deceitful, vengeful, manipulative and childish? Wait, that pretty much describes them whether they are together OR apart -- this way they can at least have make-up sex] More passionate kissing ensues and they fall to the well- christened couch, kissing and making loud smacking/sucking noises.
Liza and Adam once again break suction and she pants her desire to go upstairs. Adam, surprisingly, declines and pulls away. He says he WANTS to, and he HATES spoiling a perfect moment like this, but they HAVE to talk about Arlene. Liza says Arlene can WAIT! They'll deal with it later, TOGETHER. Suction resumes and they lay back on the couch again, entwining limbs, but still keeping their feet on the floor. As they start to roll, Arlene walks in (but they don't hear her). She stands over them and watches for a little bit, then tells Liza not to start something she can't finish or she'll end up like Arlene, in the family way. Adam and Liza disentangle themselves and Liza sits up and rebuttons her blouse, confidently telling Arlene to "bluff away". Arlene says it's true and for Adam to TELL HER that they are expecting. Adam has assumed a Rodan's Thinker position, then sits up and tells Liza it's true. Arlene chuckles: "Isn't it GREAT? Your little Colby can be a big sister to my little baby!" Arlene stares at her like she's got a potent yeast infection then turns to Adam, who looks glum.
Liza jumps up and calmly demands that Adam tell her that Arlene is drunk or that he's lying for her. Adam ruefully says it's true. Liza turns to Arlene and asks who the father is (the implication being that it can't POSSIBLY be ADAM's). Arlene says there's no doubt that it's Adam's and she's staying, at ADAM'S request. Adam hastily jumps in and says that HAYLEY intervened and they thought it would be best for the baby if Arlene stayed there. Liza turns back to Arlene and accuses her of doing ANYTHING to keep her claws into Adam. Arlene says Liza has it all wrong -- Adam found HER, in bed, and was so persistent that they didn't even have time to use protection. Liza tells her she's beneath contempt. She picks up her purse and starts to leave, and Adam puts a hand on her arm, begging her not to let Arlene get to her -- they can work this out. Liza: "Don't TOUCH me!" She turns and asks Arlene: "You think this child that you're carrying is your ticket to ride? You're going to get exactly what's coming to you. I promise you." Liza storms out with Adam running after her like a lapdog. Arlene gloats. Adam returns to the room, having been unsuccessful in stopping Liza. Arlene curls up proprietarily on the couch, wondering if Winnie has stocked the fridge -- she has a sudden craving for pistachio ice cream. She folds her arms protectively over her womb and coyly smiles up at Adam, certain that her future has been secured.
SOS
As two professional dance couples twirl enough to make the Tasmanian Devil dizzy, Hayley is pouting and Mateo asks what's wrong. As Mark Consuelos prearranges his "surprised" face, she tells him that Arlene dropped the mother of all whammies on her dad: "She's pregnant." Mateo's already surprised face blinks in surprise. He can't BELIEVE it! Hayley sadly tells him it's true -- and she is BEYOND scared for that kid.
Leo is on the phone with Greenlee, wondering where she is. She says she's busy. She's standing in some dark place. He asks to her come down to SOS and join him, but she says not tonight and hangs up. Bianca walks up, still dressed in her funeral attire. After all, SOS *IS* the official place to go when someone dies (didn't Raquel take Gillian there after the first time Dimitri died?) She's just been on the phone with Erica (because SOS is where EVERYONE goes to make phone calls) and informs Leo that Erica is not thrilled that Bianca is there, but she didn't force her to come home. Bianca says Leo has helped her through the worst week of her life and she wants to return the favor -- she can tell his mind is elsewhere and she's guessing it's with Greenlee. He pouts that she just blew him off and it probably has something to do with Ryan Lavery.
Hayley and Mateo discuss the newest threat to her sobriety, i.e., Arlene's pregnancy. Hayley takes a large glass of water to a table and she fills him in on hospital tests and Adam's inclination to boot Arlene to the the far side of the moon, baby and all, but that she, Hayley, talked him out of it. Mateo says they have to keep an eye on Arlene and make sure she takes care of that baby, because he doesn't trust her. Hayley explodes that the baby can't compete with Arlene, who does WHATEVER she wants WHENEVER she wants. Arlene will continue to drink and to shack up with losers. It's not FAIR! Hayley says she eats right, takes vitamins and takes good care of her body and she STILL can't get pregnant -- Arlene treats her body like a landfill and BOOM, she gets pregnant! Arlene chooses that moment to interrupt them and ask if Hayley's told Mateo the news and, BTW, what does a mother-to- be have to do to get a drink around here? Hayley looks like she's going to hurl and MC looks off camera and tries to discreetly dislodge something from his teeth.
Meanwhile, over at Bianca and Leo's table, Bianca tells Leo that it's OBVIOUS that he and Greenlee have something going on. He says that's true, but it's the DIRECTION he's worried about [well, there IS that new director]. He talks about how Greenlee is all over the place, the highest highs and the lowest lows -- butter pecan ice cream sends her into paroxysms of bliss, but if someone cuts her off on the freeway, he's the biggest SOB on the planet! [Hmmmm, looks like it could be a "bi" storyline after all -- bi-polar, that is] "And get her started on Ryan Lavery?" he snorts. [Meanwhile, the happy blonde dancer and her wooden partner who counts all his steps are dancing so close to the table that I worry that she's going to be dipped into the dip (but the dazzling smile will never leave her face)] Leo is downcast and says Greenlee used to say Ryan was the only man she'd ever love and now she hates his guts. Bianca thinks it's Shakespeare 101 and Greenlee is protesting too much. Leo says that wherever Ryan is tonight, Greenlee is probably hot on his heels. She suggests he go after her, but he passes, preferring not to fall flat on his face again. Protesting too much, he says she can chase Ryan until her legs fall off -- he doesn't care! He's moving on! Bianca gives him a knowing, close-mouthed smile.
Mateo goes to the bar and asks Arlene if she wants 1%, 2% or non-fat. Arlene says you'd have to PAY her to drink "moo juice". Hayley reminds her that the baby needs calcium. Arlene simpers that Hayley is trying to take care of her and her little sister. Hayley says it's too soon to tell if it's a girl, but Arlene says she is hoping. Hayley: "Riiight... the daughter you never had." Arlene takes a breath and admits to Hayley that she missed a lot of her growing up. Hayley: "Blackouts will DO that." Arlene orders a diet coke. Hayley sneers that Arlene will then pour a flask of something into the caffeine. Do the words "fetal alcohol syndrome" mean ANYTHING to Arlene? Arlene snaps that she's doing everything by the book ("the Bartender's Manual?" asks Hayley) and has even tossed out the--. Hayley asks if Arlene shouldn't be home in bed. Arlene grins like a Cheshire cat and tells Hayley that Adam has a date -- he should be telling Liza the great news of the unexpected visitor right now! Arlene passes on the drink and says she wants to get home in time to see Liza leaving with her tail between her legs [oh, she'll probably have something between her legs, all right, and the word "tail" might factor into the equation, too]! She rummages through her purse for her keys and Hayley takes the opportunity to dive into it and retrieve the flask that Arlene had said was thrown out. Hayley: "Miraculous! Your flask has a homing device!" Arlene said she WOULD have tossed it away if she'd had the chance. Hayley tosses the flask to Mateo and walks away in disgust. Arlene looks at Hayley in a "well, that was an unfortunate little moment" manner. She tells Hayley she'll talk to her later, then leaves. Hayley grouses to Mateo about how they cannot just stand by and let Arlene decimate this baby's life! Mateo says that doesn't have to happen. They are going to adopt Arlene's baby. [He doesn't ASK her this, he TELLS her]
As they walk over to the bar to get away from the Blissful Blonde and Count Two- Step, Bianca asks about Leo's chances with Greenlee if she actually gets Ryan out of her system. Leo says there's still no chance -- too much game-playing. Greenlee has made the Battle of the Sexes an Olympic event! He needs a lover, not a competitor! Their plan has failed, however, because Blondie and Happy Toes are once again twirling so close that Bianca's hair keeps flying up from the breeze. Bianca asks if he wants to call it a night. He says sure, but does she feel like facing her mom yet? Bianca tells him it's okay, she'll stay and call a cab to take her home. Leo says it's all right, he'll stay. In a baffling [to me] turn, Bianca says: "Quick, call "The Exposer!" "Erica Kane's daughter behind the eight ball!" Wouldn't my mom love that?" Leo: "All right, I hear you. [Well, *I* don't -- 'splain it to me!] He asks if she's sure she'll be all right and she says she'll be fine. What about Greenlee? He tells her that Greenlee doesn't know what she's missing, then flubbs it and calls Bianca "Greenlee", then leaves. [Um, what part of this will Erica get upset about: a) Leo staying with a grieving, rebellious Bianca in a salsa pickup joint late at night, or b) Leo LEAVING a grieving, rebellious Bianca on her own at a salsa pickup joint late at night? Hmmm, tough call!] Bianca smiles indulgently at him and watches him leave.
The world-weary Hayley asks Mateo if he's serious about adopting Arlene's baby. He says he's DEAD serious. Arlene had a FLASK in her purse! What kind of life would that baby have to look forward to? Hayley says she wouldn't wish her childhood on anyone. Mateo: "Exactly! We're stopping that cycle!" At least this way the baby will have a decent home and will be loved and cared for. Hayley likes the sound of that. Mateo says it's not like the baby will be alone, either -- they are going to have lots of kids so it will have lots of brothers and sisters to play with (so much for THAT). Hayley thinks it would be great, like MATEO'S childhood. She says he's AMAZING and she loves him. They hug and Hayley smiles, but looks as if she's just thought of something.
Bianca wanders around the club aimlessly and sits in a corner. Hayley is deep in thought. Mateo comes up and asks if she's thinking about what he said [no she's thinking that the floor needs to be mopped]. He thinks it would work -- are they good to go? Hayley smiles, takes a deep breath and says they are good to go! [Again with that "normal" voice -- DEFINITELY a new director in town]
RAPUNZEL'S TURRET O' LUV
Ryan enters carrying roses and bags containing the accouterments of trysting (one entire bag from Dave's Candleria, no doubt). The mustiest pillows on the East Coast are strewn about. Ryan wobbles his head like a sap and appropriately sappy music plays as he remembers time spent with Gillian. While most guys would probably instantly picture her butt naked and spread-eagled on the musty pillows, writhing in unquenchable passion, Ryan remembers putting a ring on her finger and strewing rose petals on the bed and HIM eventually taking his shirt off and them falling to the bed. Still unable to focus on the luscious nubileness of Gillian's body, he then the remembers another day with them standing, holding hands and staring at each other, then kissing slowly and passionately. Back in the moment, a knock sounds at the door and the music mercifully ends. He calls Gillian's name and rushes to the door. When he opens it, Greenlee flounces in. She followed him to the turret. He tells her to get out and she says he's not giving her the brushoff THIS time, not after he RUINED her LIFE. Her life? She informs him that she's being exiled back to California to live with her parents. Greenlee: "Well, to HELL with THAT and to HELL with YOU!"
Ryan tells Greenlee he's not going to go another 10 rounds with her. As he does this, he takes an exceptionally fake bouquet of red roses and puts them in a vase on a little table. A furious Greenlee picks up the vase and throws it against the concrete walls. In a line straight out of Fatal Attraction, Greenlee says: "I will NOT be IGNORED!" Her life is ruined because of HIM, yada, yada, yada. He stupidly continues to prep the room for hot sex with Gillian. He tells her that he owns up to his mistakes and she should own up to HERS. Where did she get the idea that money could buy love? At this point, she looks around the room and it dawns on her that Ryan is feathering a nest with bright shiny things. She exclaims that this is where he and Gillian go to cheat on Jake and he's expecting Gillian to dump her husband TONIGHT and meet him there! He stares at her with the merest hint of grim satisfaction and an expression that says: "... And?"
Greenlee yells at Ryan that he has no class, conscience or scruples. Ryan incredulously asks if SHE'S incredibly pristine? She says at least SHE'S not cheating on her husband on his first night back from the trenches! Ryan balls up his fist and says Gillian is NOT cheating on Jake. Greenlee is momentarily confused -- Jake KNOWS? Ryan says Gillian is telling Jake TONIGHT. Greenlee is triumphant -- Jake is never going to give Gillian up without a fight! Greenlee: ""Welcome home from the war, Jake. Here's your mail. And by the way, I'm dumping you for my ex." Get a clue!" Ryan saw them at the press conference and he KNOWS how crazy in love Jake is with Gillian. He's fought for those orphans, and he's not giving Gillian up without a fight!
Ryan informs Greenlee that he and Gillian belong together and if she and the Martin's can't accept that, too bad, because living without Gillian is NOT an option. Rather than saying "That can be arranged", Greenlee merely reiterates that Jake will having something to say about it. Ryan says they may fight, but HE will win. Greenlee mocks him for taking on a war casualty. Ryan says they both saved each other's lives, so he and Jake are even (Ryan is waving the fake flowers around). Greenlee: "Really? Aren't you trying to steal his WIFE?" He grits his teeth and wonders why he's even talking to Greenlee. He tells her that neither he nor Gillian want to hurt Jake, but she loves RYAN and wants to be with HIM, not Jake, and it's not fair to anyone to go on pretending. He slams the flowers into another vase [Hey, Dave, do you sell vases, too?].
Greenlee tells Ryan that they are really very much alike. He considers this prospect to be frightening, indeed. Greenlee: "That's true. We keep reaching for what we want, and what we want is almost always unreachable, but that doesn't stop us. We keep reaching until someone gets hurt, you know? Sometimes that someone is the other guy, but most of the time it's us." [There must be a new writer on the staff, too] Ryan slaps his hand to his forehead and asks how many times he has to tell her that he didn't mean to hurt her. She says that he DID, though, and she set out to hurt him back. She shakes her head at his patheticness and says that, looking around this little fairy-tale castle with him waiting for his princess, she now realizes that she doesn't have to lift a finger to hurt him. Jake will do it FOR her -- she just wishes she could be there to see it. She clomps out and slams the arched, fairy-tale door. Ryan works his jaw muscles and mentally pushes aside any obstacles to his fairy-tale love.
THE UNRECOGNIZABLE MARTIN LIVING ROOM
Gillian sits in the rocking chair and broods, remembering pushing Joe into telling her about Jake's erectile (THERE'S a word that Word doesn't recognize) dysfunction (a word Word is VERY familiar with). Gillian frets (no doubt thinking it's all HER fault), then looks at her watch and realizes she has to call Ryan. From the living room of the Martin house. In her haste and general nervousness, she knocks a leather bag off the edge of the desk. As she bends to pick the stuff up, she finds an unsealed letter from Jake to her, written while he was in Chechnya. TPTB continue to work overtime to try and redeem Jake after the way he treated GeeYan:
Jake's voice reading the letter: "My dearest Gillian, it's late and the only sound is the bombs falling in the distance. It's impossible to sleep, and the loneliness is damn near unbearable. So I'm traveling back in time, back to Pine Valley, back to you, and the first time we made love. I'm remembering how impossibly soft your skin felt, the way your hair spilled across your shoulders, the smell of your perfume, the taste of your lips. [I'm remembering that Myrtle had to TELL you to do this and then she and Ray sat downstairs, sipped tea and listened to you and Gillian having sex] I'm back in your arms, pacing my breathing to yours, feeling closer to heaven than I ever felt possible. [I'm remembering that Myrtle probably had to replace the carpet because of the ground-in rose petals] Falling in love with you was a gift, Gillian, that I never expected." Jake walks into the room and finishes the letter for her: "You're my world, Gillian, my safe harbor, my compass on the long voyage home. And I love you with all my heart and soul, in the name of everything that's good, honest, and true. I live to give you my love again." [P.S. Please remember to take the garbage to the curb on Wednesday nights, and for GOD'S SAKE, put a filter in the bathroom sink so your hair doesn't clog the drain ... AGAIN] Gillian sort of bares her teeth and stares at him.
Gillian tells him that the letter is beautiful. She asks why he never sent the letter. [She's got a point -- a letter like that would probably inspire a touch more loyalty than "tepid regards to my intellectually challenged wife, whats- her-name" sent via his father]. Gillian looks away in guilt and says she doesn't know what to say. Jake says her name [and now I notice what others have -- he's incapable of pronouncing the Ls in her name -- where does he think he is, Quebec?] He apologizes once more for leaving PV the way he did and wants her to know it wasn't because of her -- he was just really mixed up. If he could do it over again, he never would have left. While he was in Chechnya he realized that there were two things that kept him going: GeeYan and his family [well, mostly his family]. Now that he's back, he sees that she's given him a purpose that he's never had in life. She wrinkles her brows and says so much has happened. He knows they can't go back, but they can start over now, step by step. He'd never pressure her [NOW, NOW,NOW!!!!] He's not going to give up on her again, yada, yada, yada, work together, yada, yada, yada. She stares at him like she's trying to figure out the instructions for installing a ceiling fan.
Gillian caresses Jake's face from about 3' away from him, saying there's no one else like him. Rather than be pulled into an embrace, she sits down and talks about how he took such great care of her after the car crash and taught her how to speak again. He says he taught her too well and he misses the way she used to mangle the English language. She goes on about how patient and kind he was and how he asked her to marry him and she was so sure they were meant to be together and then everything just fell apart and he lost Colby [I yell at Gillian to BREATHE]. Gillian FINALLY gets a spine and says: "And we lost each OTHER! Jake, you never even said GOODBYE to me when you left Pine Valley!" He says he knows -- he was hurting and stupid. She says she thought that he had stopped loving her. He just LEFT! She didn't blame him since she lied to him and herself. She struggled to figure out where they fit into each other's lives. He subtly lets her know that he knows by saying he knows it was really rough on her with him leaving like that, and he's not the kind of guy that would expect her to sit around waiting for him to come home and not live her life. Gillian loses her accent again and says she really, REALLY thought that they were OVER. He says he did too until [playing the guilt card] he saw life and death in a war zone, with bombs falling all around and beautiful children dying in his arms [where is a violin when you really need one?]. Gillian continues to work on her arithmetic, now trying to count to 91 in base 7. She looks slightly resistant. ... And that's when she dropped in and brought him home. She's his LIFELINE [loaded deck full of guilt cards]. He knows she's confused and he wants her to know that he's THERE for her -- she can just grab ahold and not let go! ["BTW, GeeYan, I have something in my bag for the cause of those faces you're making -- it works gently, overnight."]
Gillian looks pissed off and gets up to walk across the room away from Jake. He gets up and winces in pain, putting his hand in the small of his back (but she doesn't see it because her back is to him). He walks over to her and pets her, saying he's said all he can say tonight and he's going to bed. He kisses her hair and she continues scowling. He walks up the stairs like it's quite a chore and Gillian starts to cry. Joe appears from the opposite side of the room [was he listening outside the door?] and calls her name. She runs to the comforting embrace of his arms. [Ray MacDonald thinks: "Is this job still GREAT or WHAT?]
Gillian paces the room and frets to Joe that she HATES what's happened to Jake -- he deserves so much better, and it wasn't supposed to BE this way! She blurts out, uncomprehendingly, that Jake LOVES her! Joe is surprised and says of COURSE he does. Does that surprise her? Gillian: "No! No! No, he has a TREMENDOUS heart [if not hard-on] and he wants to give it to ME!" She says like Jake must be INSANE! They sit on the couch [and I wonder if that straight metal belt buckle is digging into her belly]. Joe says that he didn't tell Gillian about Jake's "injury" to make her feel guilty. Jake would be very upset to find out that he told her, and not just because of his pride. She knows that. Joe waxes poetic about how Jake has always drifted through life without a purpose (and that's why Jake likes sailing so much) until she and Colby happened to him. Now he's making plans for the future, and that's a first! Then he says: "You're the one, Gillian. His search has ended with you." Gillian says she just feels so HELPLESS! Joe tells her that Jake has one hell of a fight on his hands and he can't do it himself, so it's a good thing she gives great hummers [okay, I made up that last part]. He says Jake needs her by his side -- please don't desert him! Gillian stares at him.
THE ULTRA-SAFE, IMMACULATE 24-HOUR BOATHOUSE
Leo walks in to brood. He spies a flattened rose on the floorboards from that morning and picks it up. [Do the groundskeepers ever find used condoms in the boathouse in the mornings?] He remembers Greenlee railing about Ryan and getting back at him, then kissing Greenlee to shut her up. Back in the moment, Greenlee walks in and tells him he looks far away. He says that he was actually close. She says she didn't expect to find him there and he petulantly says he wasn't waiting for HER. She sits down and he asks how Ryan is doing. She's surprised he knows she was with Ryan. He says that one thing he's learned about her is that she ALWAYS makes a play for the obvious. She says she scared herself tonight -- she waited outside the loft for Ryan and then followed him over to Wildwind. She doesn't know why -- she just wanted to make him suffer. Leo, crossing his arms: "Did it work?" She says no, but she learned something tonight -- she is OVER Ryan. She is really, FINALLY over him. Leo finds that hard to believe. She doesn't blame him and says it doesn't matter if he believes her or not -- she's out of HIS (Leo's) life, too. He does a double- take as she explains that her grandparents found out about Wade and the $3M and are sending her back to California, no joke. This is goodbye. There are unshed tears glistening in Leo's eyes.
Leo jumps up and paces, saying she's NOT going to California -- she's not going ANYWHERE without him! She says she's got the orders on high from her grandparents -- she's banished to La Jolla, land of sun and surf. Leo says they'll fight back and get them to reverse their orders. They'll think of something! He'll get David to quarantine her, saying she has a galloping case of Dengue Fever. Leo: "If that doesn't work, we'll go underground. We'll survive on our wits, which,on the surface sounds scary, but we'll manage. We'll assume new identities. I'll be Natasha, you be Boris!" She grabs him and kisses him deeply. He asks what that was for and she says it's a thank you. For what? Greenlee: "For being ultimately, wonderfully REACHable." [All together now: AWWWWWWW!!!]
END-OF-SHOW MUSICAL MONTAGE
Greenlee and Leo kiss.
Camera fades to the Martin living room. Joe says he doesn't mean to pressure Gillian [then hands her a cup to pee in]. Her life and her decisions are her own, but his son needs her -- help him to heal, if she can. He gets up and goes to bed. Gillian puts her head on her hand and worries.
Camera fades into a spiral above Jake's bed. Jake looks worried. One hand is behind his head and the other is just above, but not quite on, his crotch. He looks in the direction of his lowered hand, looks frightened and turns to look at Gillian's picture on his nightstand. He picks it up and stares at it while the background singer croons about being the man he has to be.
Camera fades to Ryan staring out Rapunzel's tower window, watching futilely for Gillian to arrive. Dave's Candleria has clearly made a big sale today, because candles are blazing throughout the room, many of them surrounding the now full bouquet of fake roses on the little table [they must be fire-retardant]. Ryan looks at his empty love nest full of bright shiny things and blazing sticks of wax and broods.
ON THE NEXT AMC:
At SOS Erica tells a guilty-looking Bianca: "You lied to me!"
At the boathouse, Dimitri sits down and says to Ryan (who appears to have his hands tied behind him to the bench): "Tonight I was the only person standing between you and a BIG mistake." Ryan appears to break free from his bonds.
Jake tells Gillian: "I've never felt so alive as when I do right now and I want to show you." He bends to kiss her.
Irreverently submitted,
Robin "now would be a good time for him to have an attack of lumbago" Coutellier
Adam: "It'd be in the baby's best interest if Arlene stays here." Hayley: "With the two of us watching you, you're going to wish you had used birth control."
Greenlee: "We're not finished." Ryan: "Yes we are, Greenlee. We're finished. Do you understand that? We're dead."
Jake to Gillian: "You and Ryan were married, I know, but there are still feelings between you, just as there are still feelings between you and me.
[NOTE: I notice that Gillian's voice suddenly goes "normal" lately when she is saying something particularly heartfelt, as opposed to "actressy". Hayley is doing that lately, too, as well as Arlene. Must be a new director in town]
CHANDLER LIVING ROOM
Liza stands in the doorway to the living room and says she thought Arlene would be gone by now. Arlene says a package arrived, special delivery. Liza tells her to take her package and leave and Arlene counters that Adam has a big investment in it -- it's sort of like a joint venture. Liza scoffs at the idea of Adam being in business with Arlene: "Is she drunk?" Arlene says she's off the sauce, doctor's orders. She informs Liza that the doctor did a blood panel with surprising results. Liza: "Liver shot?" She doesn't care about Arlene's medical problems. Arlene says it's not a problem, it's a blessing. She starts to tell Liza about the baby, but Adam interrupts her at the last second, telling her that he and Liza have a date. Arlene blinks for a couple of seconds, then says okay and breezes off to see Hayley to do a little mother/child bonding. Adam glowers at her. Liza wonders what THAT was all about and Adam says she doesn't want to know. She questions the "joint venture" and tells Adam to give Arlene whatever amount of money she wants -- anything to just get RID of her because Liza, Adam and Colby should be together. Adam smiles. Liza says she wants that right now -- she doesn't want to wait. They kiss passionately.
Later on, the camera pans around the living room to them, still standing there kissing. [As the top of the stuff on the bar comes into view, I wonder why there are what appear to be 4 bottles of medicinal grade Listerine to the right of the crystal decanters] They break the suction and tell each other that they've waited all their lives for this and that their life until now has been hell on earth. He asks if she forgives him. She says: "Love forgives everything. And I love you very much." [I wonder if this means she has a terminal disease and if they are going to make snow-angels and have hot chocolate before he takes her to the hospital to die] Adam inhales deeply and savors her saying she loves him. Liza talks about how, when they were apart, she was prideful, angry and frustrated and she had no joy in her life [what's Colby, chopped liver? Grated cheese?] She wants it to be like it used to be [Deceitful, vengeful, manipulative and childish? Wait, that pretty much describes them whether they are together OR apart -- this way they can at least have make-up sex] More passionate kissing ensues and they fall to the well- christened couch, kissing and making loud smacking/sucking noises.
Liza and Adam once again break suction and she pants her desire to go upstairs. Adam, surprisingly, declines and pulls away. He says he WANTS to, and he HATES spoiling a perfect moment like this, but they HAVE to talk about Arlene. Liza says Arlene can WAIT! They'll deal with it later, TOGETHER. Suction resumes and they lay back on the couch again, entwining limbs, but still keeping their feet on the floor. As they start to roll, Arlene walks in (but they don't hear her). She stands over them and watches for a little bit, then tells Liza not to start something she can't finish or she'll end up like Arlene, in the family way. Adam and Liza disentangle themselves and Liza sits up and rebuttons her blouse, confidently telling Arlene to "bluff away". Arlene says it's true and for Adam to TELL HER that they are expecting. Adam has assumed a Rodan's Thinker position, then sits up and tells Liza it's true. Arlene chuckles: "Isn't it GREAT? Your little Colby can be a big sister to my little baby!" Arlene stares at her like she's got a potent yeast infection then turns to Adam, who looks glum.
Liza jumps up and calmly demands that Adam tell her that Arlene is drunk or that he's lying for her. Adam ruefully says it's true. Liza turns to Arlene and asks who the father is (the implication being that it can't POSSIBLY be ADAM's). Arlene says there's no doubt that it's Adam's and she's staying, at ADAM'S request. Adam hastily jumps in and says that HAYLEY intervened and they thought it would be best for the baby if Arlene stayed there. Liza turns back to Arlene and accuses her of doing ANYTHING to keep her claws into Adam. Arlene says Liza has it all wrong -- Adam found HER, in bed, and was so persistent that they didn't even have time to use protection. Liza tells her she's beneath contempt. She picks up her purse and starts to leave, and Adam puts a hand on her arm, begging her not to let Arlene get to her -- they can work this out. Liza: "Don't TOUCH me!" She turns and asks Arlene: "You think this child that you're carrying is your ticket to ride? You're going to get exactly what's coming to you. I promise you." Liza storms out with Adam running after her like a lapdog. Arlene gloats. Adam returns to the room, having been unsuccessful in stopping Liza. Arlene curls up proprietarily on the couch, wondering if Winnie has stocked the fridge -- she has a sudden craving for pistachio ice cream. She folds her arms protectively over her womb and coyly smiles up at Adam, certain that her future has been secured.
SOS
As two professional dance couples twirl enough to make the Tasmanian Devil dizzy, Hayley is pouting and Mateo asks what's wrong. As Mark Consuelos prearranges his "surprised" face, she tells him that Arlene dropped the mother of all whammies on her dad: "She's pregnant." Mateo's already surprised face blinks in surprise. He can't BELIEVE it! Hayley sadly tells him it's true -- and she is BEYOND scared for that kid.
Leo is on the phone with Greenlee, wondering where she is. She says she's busy. She's standing in some dark place. He asks to her come down to SOS and join him, but she says not tonight and hangs up. Bianca walks up, still dressed in her funeral attire. After all, SOS *IS* the official place to go when someone dies (didn't Raquel take Gillian there after the first time Dimitri died?) She's just been on the phone with Erica (because SOS is where EVERYONE goes to make phone calls) and informs Leo that Erica is not thrilled that Bianca is there, but she didn't force her to come home. Bianca says Leo has helped her through the worst week of her life and she wants to return the favor -- she can tell his mind is elsewhere and she's guessing it's with Greenlee. He pouts that she just blew him off and it probably has something to do with Ryan Lavery.
Hayley and Mateo discuss the newest threat to her sobriety, i.e., Arlene's pregnancy. Hayley takes a large glass of water to a table and she fills him in on hospital tests and Adam's inclination to boot Arlene to the the far side of the moon, baby and all, but that she, Hayley, talked him out of it. Mateo says they have to keep an eye on Arlene and make sure she takes care of that baby, because he doesn't trust her. Hayley explodes that the baby can't compete with Arlene, who does WHATEVER she wants WHENEVER she wants. Arlene will continue to drink and to shack up with losers. It's not FAIR! Hayley says she eats right, takes vitamins and takes good care of her body and she STILL can't get pregnant -- Arlene treats her body like a landfill and BOOM, she gets pregnant! Arlene chooses that moment to interrupt them and ask if Hayley's told Mateo the news and, BTW, what does a mother-to- be have to do to get a drink around here? Hayley looks like she's going to hurl and MC looks off camera and tries to discreetly dislodge something from his teeth.
Meanwhile, over at Bianca and Leo's table, Bianca tells Leo that it's OBVIOUS that he and Greenlee have something going on. He says that's true, but it's the DIRECTION he's worried about [well, there IS that new director]. He talks about how Greenlee is all over the place, the highest highs and the lowest lows -- butter pecan ice cream sends her into paroxysms of bliss, but if someone cuts her off on the freeway, he's the biggest SOB on the planet! [Hmmmm, looks like it could be a "bi" storyline after all -- bi-polar, that is] "And get her started on Ryan Lavery?" he snorts. [Meanwhile, the happy blonde dancer and her wooden partner who counts all his steps are dancing so close to the table that I worry that she's going to be dipped into the dip (but the dazzling smile will never leave her face)] Leo is downcast and says Greenlee used to say Ryan was the only man she'd ever love and now she hates his guts. Bianca thinks it's Shakespeare 101 and Greenlee is protesting too much. Leo says that wherever Ryan is tonight, Greenlee is probably hot on his heels. She suggests he go after her, but he passes, preferring not to fall flat on his face again. Protesting too much, he says she can chase Ryan until her legs fall off -- he doesn't care! He's moving on! Bianca gives him a knowing, close-mouthed smile.
Mateo goes to the bar and asks Arlene if she wants 1%, 2% or non-fat. Arlene says you'd have to PAY her to drink "moo juice". Hayley reminds her that the baby needs calcium. Arlene simpers that Hayley is trying to take care of her and her little sister. Hayley says it's too soon to tell if it's a girl, but Arlene says she is hoping. Hayley: "Riiight... the daughter you never had." Arlene takes a breath and admits to Hayley that she missed a lot of her growing up. Hayley: "Blackouts will DO that." Arlene orders a diet coke. Hayley sneers that Arlene will then pour a flask of something into the caffeine. Do the words "fetal alcohol syndrome" mean ANYTHING to Arlene? Arlene snaps that she's doing everything by the book ("the Bartender's Manual?" asks Hayley) and has even tossed out the--. Hayley asks if Arlene shouldn't be home in bed. Arlene grins like a Cheshire cat and tells Hayley that Adam has a date -- he should be telling Liza the great news of the unexpected visitor right now! Arlene passes on the drink and says she wants to get home in time to see Liza leaving with her tail between her legs [oh, she'll probably have something between her legs, all right, and the word "tail" might factor into the equation, too]! She rummages through her purse for her keys and Hayley takes the opportunity to dive into it and retrieve the flask that Arlene had said was thrown out. Hayley: "Miraculous! Your flask has a homing device!" Arlene said she WOULD have tossed it away if she'd had the chance. Hayley tosses the flask to Mateo and walks away in disgust. Arlene looks at Hayley in a "well, that was an unfortunate little moment" manner. She tells Hayley she'll talk to her later, then leaves. Hayley grouses to Mateo about how they cannot just stand by and let Arlene decimate this baby's life! Mateo says that doesn't have to happen. They are going to adopt Arlene's baby. [He doesn't ASK her this, he TELLS her]
As they walk over to the bar to get away from the Blissful Blonde and Count Two- Step, Bianca asks about Leo's chances with Greenlee if she actually gets Ryan out of her system. Leo says there's still no chance -- too much game-playing. Greenlee has made the Battle of the Sexes an Olympic event! He needs a lover, not a competitor! Their plan has failed, however, because Blondie and Happy Toes are once again twirling so close that Bianca's hair keeps flying up from the breeze. Bianca asks if he wants to call it a night. He says sure, but does she feel like facing her mom yet? Bianca tells him it's okay, she'll stay and call a cab to take her home. Leo says it's all right, he'll stay. In a baffling [to me] turn, Bianca says: "Quick, call "The Exposer!" "Erica Kane's daughter behind the eight ball!" Wouldn't my mom love that?" Leo: "All right, I hear you. [Well, *I* don't -- 'splain it to me!] He asks if she's sure she'll be all right and she says she'll be fine. What about Greenlee? He tells her that Greenlee doesn't know what she's missing, then flubbs it and calls Bianca "Greenlee", then leaves. [Um, what part of this will Erica get upset about: a) Leo staying with a grieving, rebellious Bianca in a salsa pickup joint late at night, or b) Leo LEAVING a grieving, rebellious Bianca on her own at a salsa pickup joint late at night? Hmmm, tough call!] Bianca smiles indulgently at him and watches him leave.
The world-weary Hayley asks Mateo if he's serious about adopting Arlene's baby. He says he's DEAD serious. Arlene had a FLASK in her purse! What kind of life would that baby have to look forward to? Hayley says she wouldn't wish her childhood on anyone. Mateo: "Exactly! We're stopping that cycle!" At least this way the baby will have a decent home and will be loved and cared for. Hayley likes the sound of that. Mateo says it's not like the baby will be alone, either -- they are going to have lots of kids so it will have lots of brothers and sisters to play with (so much for THAT). Hayley thinks it would be great, like MATEO'S childhood. She says he's AMAZING and she loves him. They hug and Hayley smiles, but looks as if she's just thought of something.
Bianca wanders around the club aimlessly and sits in a corner. Hayley is deep in thought. Mateo comes up and asks if she's thinking about what he said [no she's thinking that the floor needs to be mopped]. He thinks it would work -- are they good to go? Hayley smiles, takes a deep breath and says they are good to go! [Again with that "normal" voice -- DEFINITELY a new director in town]
RAPUNZEL'S TURRET O' LUV
Ryan enters carrying roses and bags containing the accouterments of trysting (one entire bag from Dave's Candleria, no doubt). The mustiest pillows on the East Coast are strewn about. Ryan wobbles his head like a sap and appropriately sappy music plays as he remembers time spent with Gillian. While most guys would probably instantly picture her butt naked and spread-eagled on the musty pillows, writhing in unquenchable passion, Ryan remembers putting a ring on her finger and strewing rose petals on the bed and HIM eventually taking his shirt off and them falling to the bed. Still unable to focus on the luscious nubileness of Gillian's body, he then the remembers another day with them standing, holding hands and staring at each other, then kissing slowly and passionately. Back in the moment, a knock sounds at the door and the music mercifully ends. He calls Gillian's name and rushes to the door. When he opens it, Greenlee flounces in. She followed him to the turret. He tells her to get out and she says he's not giving her the brushoff THIS time, not after he RUINED her LIFE. Her life? She informs him that she's being exiled back to California to live with her parents. Greenlee: "Well, to HELL with THAT and to HELL with YOU!"
Ryan tells Greenlee he's not going to go another 10 rounds with her. As he does this, he takes an exceptionally fake bouquet of red roses and puts them in a vase on a little table. A furious Greenlee picks up the vase and throws it against the concrete walls. In a line straight out of Fatal Attraction, Greenlee says: "I will NOT be IGNORED!" Her life is ruined because of HIM, yada, yada, yada. He stupidly continues to prep the room for hot sex with Gillian. He tells her that he owns up to his mistakes and she should own up to HERS. Where did she get the idea that money could buy love? At this point, she looks around the room and it dawns on her that Ryan is feathering a nest with bright shiny things. She exclaims that this is where he and Gillian go to cheat on Jake and he's expecting Gillian to dump her husband TONIGHT and meet him there! He stares at her with the merest hint of grim satisfaction and an expression that says: "... And?"
Greenlee yells at Ryan that he has no class, conscience or scruples. Ryan incredulously asks if SHE'S incredibly pristine? She says at least SHE'S not cheating on her husband on his first night back from the trenches! Ryan balls up his fist and says Gillian is NOT cheating on Jake. Greenlee is momentarily confused -- Jake KNOWS? Ryan says Gillian is telling Jake TONIGHT. Greenlee is triumphant -- Jake is never going to give Gillian up without a fight! Greenlee: ""Welcome home from the war, Jake. Here's your mail. And by the way, I'm dumping you for my ex." Get a clue!" Ryan saw them at the press conference and he KNOWS how crazy in love Jake is with Gillian. He's fought for those orphans, and he's not giving Gillian up without a fight!
Ryan informs Greenlee that he and Gillian belong together and if she and the Martin's can't accept that, too bad, because living without Gillian is NOT an option. Rather than saying "That can be arranged", Greenlee merely reiterates that Jake will having something to say about it. Ryan says they may fight, but HE will win. Greenlee mocks him for taking on a war casualty. Ryan says they both saved each other's lives, so he and Jake are even (Ryan is waving the fake flowers around). Greenlee: "Really? Aren't you trying to steal his WIFE?" He grits his teeth and wonders why he's even talking to Greenlee. He tells her that neither he nor Gillian want to hurt Jake, but she loves RYAN and wants to be with HIM, not Jake, and it's not fair to anyone to go on pretending. He slams the flowers into another vase [Hey, Dave, do you sell vases, too?].
Greenlee tells Ryan that they are really very much alike. He considers this prospect to be frightening, indeed. Greenlee: "That's true. We keep reaching for what we want, and what we want is almost always unreachable, but that doesn't stop us. We keep reaching until someone gets hurt, you know? Sometimes that someone is the other guy, but most of the time it's us." [There must be a new writer on the staff, too] Ryan slaps his hand to his forehead and asks how many times he has to tell her that he didn't mean to hurt her. She says that he DID, though, and she set out to hurt him back. She shakes her head at his patheticness and says that, looking around this little fairy-tale castle with him waiting for his princess, she now realizes that she doesn't have to lift a finger to hurt him. Jake will do it FOR her -- she just wishes she could be there to see it. She clomps out and slams the arched, fairy-tale door. Ryan works his jaw muscles and mentally pushes aside any obstacles to his fairy-tale love.
THE UNRECOGNIZABLE MARTIN LIVING ROOM
Gillian sits in the rocking chair and broods, remembering pushing Joe into telling her about Jake's erectile (THERE'S a word that Word doesn't recognize) dysfunction (a word Word is VERY familiar with). Gillian frets (no doubt thinking it's all HER fault), then looks at her watch and realizes she has to call Ryan. From the living room of the Martin house. In her haste and general nervousness, she knocks a leather bag off the edge of the desk. As she bends to pick the stuff up, she finds an unsealed letter from Jake to her, written while he was in Chechnya. TPTB continue to work overtime to try and redeem Jake after the way he treated GeeYan:
Jake's voice reading the letter: "My dearest Gillian, it's late and the only sound is the bombs falling in the distance. It's impossible to sleep, and the loneliness is damn near unbearable. So I'm traveling back in time, back to Pine Valley, back to you, and the first time we made love. I'm remembering how impossibly soft your skin felt, the way your hair spilled across your shoulders, the smell of your perfume, the taste of your lips. [I'm remembering that Myrtle had to TELL you to do this and then she and Ray sat downstairs, sipped tea and listened to you and Gillian having sex] I'm back in your arms, pacing my breathing to yours, feeling closer to heaven than I ever felt possible. [I'm remembering that Myrtle probably had to replace the carpet because of the ground-in rose petals] Falling in love with you was a gift, Gillian, that I never expected." Jake walks into the room and finishes the letter for her: "You're my world, Gillian, my safe harbor, my compass on the long voyage home. And I love you with all my heart and soul, in the name of everything that's good, honest, and true. I live to give you my love again." [P.S. Please remember to take the garbage to the curb on Wednesday nights, and for GOD'S SAKE, put a filter in the bathroom sink so your hair doesn't clog the drain ... AGAIN] Gillian sort of bares her teeth and stares at him.
Gillian tells him that the letter is beautiful. She asks why he never sent the letter. [She's got a point -- a letter like that would probably inspire a touch more loyalty than "tepid regards to my intellectually challenged wife, whats- her-name" sent via his father]. Gillian looks away in guilt and says she doesn't know what to say. Jake says her name [and now I notice what others have -- he's incapable of pronouncing the Ls in her name -- where does he think he is, Quebec?] He apologizes once more for leaving PV the way he did and wants her to know it wasn't because of her -- he was just really mixed up. If he could do it over again, he never would have left. While he was in Chechnya he realized that there were two things that kept him going: GeeYan and his family [well, mostly his family]. Now that he's back, he sees that she's given him a purpose that he's never had in life. She wrinkles her brows and says so much has happened. He knows they can't go back, but they can start over now, step by step. He'd never pressure her [NOW, NOW,NOW!!!!] He's not going to give up on her again, yada, yada, yada, work together, yada, yada, yada. She stares at him like she's trying to figure out the instructions for installing a ceiling fan.
Gillian caresses Jake's face from about 3' away from him, saying there's no one else like him. Rather than be pulled into an embrace, she sits down and talks about how he took such great care of her after the car crash and taught her how to speak again. He says he taught her too well and he misses the way she used to mangle the English language. She goes on about how patient and kind he was and how he asked her to marry him and she was so sure they were meant to be together and then everything just fell apart and he lost Colby [I yell at Gillian to BREATHE]. Gillian FINALLY gets a spine and says: "And we lost each OTHER! Jake, you never even said GOODBYE to me when you left Pine Valley!" He says he knows -- he was hurting and stupid. She says she thought that he had stopped loving her. He just LEFT! She didn't blame him since she lied to him and herself. She struggled to figure out where they fit into each other's lives. He subtly lets her know that he knows by saying he knows it was really rough on her with him leaving like that, and he's not the kind of guy that would expect her to sit around waiting for him to come home and not live her life. Gillian loses her accent again and says she really, REALLY thought that they were OVER. He says he did too until [playing the guilt card] he saw life and death in a war zone, with bombs falling all around and beautiful children dying in his arms [where is a violin when you really need one?]. Gillian continues to work on her arithmetic, now trying to count to 91 in base 7. She looks slightly resistant. ... And that's when she dropped in and brought him home. She's his LIFELINE [loaded deck full of guilt cards]. He knows she's confused and he wants her to know that he's THERE for her -- she can just grab ahold and not let go! ["BTW, GeeYan, I have something in my bag for the cause of those faces you're making -- it works gently, overnight."]
Gillian looks pissed off and gets up to walk across the room away from Jake. He gets up and winces in pain, putting his hand in the small of his back (but she doesn't see it because her back is to him). He walks over to her and pets her, saying he's said all he can say tonight and he's going to bed. He kisses her hair and she continues scowling. He walks up the stairs like it's quite a chore and Gillian starts to cry. Joe appears from the opposite side of the room [was he listening outside the door?] and calls her name. She runs to the comforting embrace of his arms. [Ray MacDonald thinks: "Is this job still GREAT or WHAT?]
Gillian paces the room and frets to Joe that she HATES what's happened to Jake -- he deserves so much better, and it wasn't supposed to BE this way! She blurts out, uncomprehendingly, that Jake LOVES her! Joe is surprised and says of COURSE he does. Does that surprise her? Gillian: "No! No! No, he has a TREMENDOUS heart [if not hard-on] and he wants to give it to ME!" She says like Jake must be INSANE! They sit on the couch [and I wonder if that straight metal belt buckle is digging into her belly]. Joe says that he didn't tell Gillian about Jake's "injury" to make her feel guilty. Jake would be very upset to find out that he told her, and not just because of his pride. She knows that. Joe waxes poetic about how Jake has always drifted through life without a purpose (and that's why Jake likes sailing so much) until she and Colby happened to him. Now he's making plans for the future, and that's a first! Then he says: "You're the one, Gillian. His search has ended with you." Gillian says she just feels so HELPLESS! Joe tells her that Jake has one hell of a fight on his hands and he can't do it himself, so it's a good thing she gives great hummers [okay, I made up that last part]. He says Jake needs her by his side -- please don't desert him! Gillian stares at him.
THE ULTRA-SAFE, IMMACULATE 24-HOUR BOATHOUSE
Leo walks in to brood. He spies a flattened rose on the floorboards from that morning and picks it up. [Do the groundskeepers ever find used condoms in the boathouse in the mornings?] He remembers Greenlee railing about Ryan and getting back at him, then kissing Greenlee to shut her up. Back in the moment, Greenlee walks in and tells him he looks far away. He says that he was actually close. She says she didn't expect to find him there and he petulantly says he wasn't waiting for HER. She sits down and he asks how Ryan is doing. She's surprised he knows she was with Ryan. He says that one thing he's learned about her is that she ALWAYS makes a play for the obvious. She says she scared herself tonight -- she waited outside the loft for Ryan and then followed him over to Wildwind. She doesn't know why -- she just wanted to make him suffer. Leo, crossing his arms: "Did it work?" She says no, but she learned something tonight -- she is OVER Ryan. She is really, FINALLY over him. Leo finds that hard to believe. She doesn't blame him and says it doesn't matter if he believes her or not -- she's out of HIS (Leo's) life, too. He does a double- take as she explains that her grandparents found out about Wade and the $3M and are sending her back to California, no joke. This is goodbye. There are unshed tears glistening in Leo's eyes.
Leo jumps up and paces, saying she's NOT going to California -- she's not going ANYWHERE without him! She says she's got the orders on high from her grandparents -- she's banished to La Jolla, land of sun and surf. Leo says they'll fight back and get them to reverse their orders. They'll think of something! He'll get David to quarantine her, saying she has a galloping case of Dengue Fever. Leo: "If that doesn't work, we'll go underground. We'll survive on our wits, which,on the surface sounds scary, but we'll manage. We'll assume new identities. I'll be Natasha, you be Boris!" She grabs him and kisses him deeply. He asks what that was for and she says it's a thank you. For what? Greenlee: "For being ultimately, wonderfully REACHable." [All together now: AWWWWWWW!!!]
END-OF-SHOW MUSICAL MONTAGE
Greenlee and Leo kiss.
Camera fades to the Martin living room. Joe says he doesn't mean to pressure Gillian [then hands her a cup to pee in]. Her life and her decisions are her own, but his son needs her -- help him to heal, if she can. He gets up and goes to bed. Gillian puts her head on her hand and worries.
Camera fades into a spiral above Jake's bed. Jake looks worried. One hand is behind his head and the other is just above, but not quite on, his crotch. He looks in the direction of his lowered hand, looks frightened and turns to look at Gillian's picture on his nightstand. He picks it up and stares at it while the background singer croons about being the man he has to be.
Camera fades to Ryan staring out Rapunzel's tower window, watching futilely for Gillian to arrive. Dave's Candleria has clearly made a big sale today, because candles are blazing throughout the room, many of them surrounding the now full bouquet of fake roses on the little table [they must be fire-retardant]. Ryan looks at his empty love nest full of bright shiny things and blazing sticks of wax and broods.
ON THE NEXT AMC:
At SOS Erica tells a guilty-looking Bianca: "You lied to me!"
At the boathouse, Dimitri sits down and says to Ryan (who appears to have his hands tied behind him to the bench): "Tonight I was the only person standing between you and a BIG mistake." Ryan appears to break free from his bonds.
Jake tells Gillian: "I've never felt so alive as when I do right now and I want to show you." He bends to kiss her.
Irreverently submitted,
Robin "now would be a good time for him to have an attack of lumbago" Coutellier
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