PREVIOUSLY ON AMC
Adam asks a fisherman about a lure that Stuart had made: "Where did it come from? It's just like the ones my brother used to tie." Man: "Could be around for some time now."
Walt (bait shop owner) to Stuart: "I wish you luck!" Stuart: "Ok. Maybe I won't need any luck in Pine Valley!"
Alex to Edmund re Dimitri: "He's come back to us. We should be thankful for that!" Edmund: "I should be thankful that my fiancee slept with my brother?" Alex: "He's my husband."
[NOTE: Apparently this is "catch up" day on AMC, filling in blanks for those who have been off on summer vacation or are being introduced to it during a group watch at college. There are flashbacks and explanations galore!]
DAVID'S OFFICE
David walks in and, although the automated voice mail prompts aren't apparent (most of which you can cut off anyway, if you know how), he actually used his TELEPHONE to retrieve a voice message, as opposed to the usual 70s style fake- wood-paneled 1'x8" answering machine. [WELCOME TO THE 21st CENTURY, AMC -- it's about TIME!] It's a carefully neutral message from Dixie saying she'll be late today because Tad is bringing the boys home from camp and she wants to be home to greet them [why didn't she just go get them with Tad?] David sighs and ponders the kiss he bestowed upon her (to shut her up, don't you know) and her horribly silent, lip-gritting [she nearly SWALLOWED her lips on THAT one] response. He snaps out of his reverie and calls the extension of the gift shop. He orders 2 dozen "peace" roses [probably should be "piece", but we won't quibble that just yet] for Mrs. Dixie Martin. [I noticed after his reverie that his shirt was unbuttoned quite a bit, showing a YUMMY expanse of hairy chest -- THANK YOU!]
TAD & DIXIE'S HOUSE
Dixie reads the paper and comments that something is NOT good. Tad and Junior burst in and Dixie is thrilled to see them. [NOTE: Tad said "BABY, we're home!", not "CADY" (this is from the closed-captioning)]. She comments on how much Junior has grown and asks what they fed him. He says "bug juice and peanut butter" [Junior's smile makes me think they DO remember now that he's fatally allergic to peanuts, but are just messing with us]. She sends him upstairs to unpack, and falls into Tad's arms the moment Junior leaves the room. They quickly catch up about hoping Adrian not only finds Jake, but also manage to drag him home somehow. Tad picks up the Wall Street Herald and moans about one of the lead articles "CONSTRUCTION SET-BACKS CONTINUE TO PLAGUE PINE VALLEY'S NEWEST OFFICE COMPLEX -- Behind Schedule and Over Budget COL-MAR Tower is Tarnishing the Promising Partnership of Liza Colby and Tad Martin". [Like Wall Street gives a flying f* about Tad and Liza and their office building. Unless it explodes, since when does an OFFICE BUILDING bring down a multi-billion dollar conglomerate?]
PINE VALLEY PARK
The camera pulls back as Adam, sitting on a park bench, reads off the headline and chuckles. He pulls his keys out of his pocket and Stuart's fishing lure comes along with it [unfortunately, it wasn't attached to hook at the time]. While Adam is wearing a suit, there is no tie and the top 2-3 buttons of his shirt are unbuttoned. He needs a haircut and shave. He remembers being in his office and seeing (and hearing) the vision of Stuart, telling him the fish are biting. [Second flashback in the space of 4 minutes.] As Adam snaps out of his reverie, Marian and Opal walk into the park (Adam is sitting at the entrance where everyone in Pine Valley is sure to walk by him). Marian comments on what a nice park it used to be, when you would never find bums sleeping on benches. He says he should have known it was them when the birds stopped singing :-) He tells them he was just daydreaming about Stuart before THEY ruined it. Opal says Stuart wouldn't even recognize Adam if he saw him NOW. Marian chimes in that he's really letting himself go. Adam rolls his eyes because he's now getting grooming advice from "the nightmare twins". He asks which direction they are going so he can go the other way. As he jumps up, the fishing lure falls on the ground and Marian bends to pick it up. She recognizes it as Stuart's and asks if Adam stole it.
HUNTING LODGE
Edmund stares at Alex. In tears, she reaches out to him to try to soften the blow, but he turns his back on her, facing Dimitri. He congratulates Dimitri for coming out on top again. [Alex: "Actually, *I* was on top"]. Edmund cuts off Dimitri's protest, turns back to Alex and asks how he's going to stop loving her. He walks out the door like the weight of the world is on him [it's certainly pressing down on his FACE] and gives them one more poor-pitiful-me look before he firmly closes the door. Alex is crying and horrified at how they had to hurt Edmund. Dimitri then stares at her and her reaction.
Having dutifully waited for the commercials to air, Alex races out the door with Dimitri at her heels. She yells at Edmund to wait, but Dimitri tells her to let him go. There's an off-camera fan blowing on Alex, moving her hair. She suddenly turns to Dimitri, questioning why Edmund said Dimitri ALWAYS wins. Dimitri says it's because he always HAS won, ever since they were born. Fill-in #3: We get a quick summary of Edmund being the illegitimate one; Alf, the groundskeeper beating and abusing Edmund for it; neither Edmund nor Dimitri knowing they were brothers until they were fully grown; Edmund inheriting Wildwind [didn't Dimitri GIVE it to Edmund later?]. Nothing changed anything until Maria came along. Then there were years of loneliness after she died. Edmund's falling in love with Alex was as unexpected for him as Dimitri's returning from the dead was for Alex. Alex blames herself for it happening too quickly. Fill-in #4: They were both needy and helped to bring each other back to life, in a way. Fill-in #5: Dimitri tells her he heard she and Edmund confessing their love right after Hayley & Mateo's wedding. He had just returned to PV, came to the Hunting Lodge looking for Alex and found the wedding invitation. After overhearing them, he decided it would be better for everyone if he remained "dead". Alex protests that she wishes she'd known he was there. It's not better for HER without him! Dimitri takes her in his arms and says that if he'd lost her, his life wouldn't be worth living.
PINE VALLEY PARK
Adam tells Marian he did NOT steal the lure -- he brought it back from Idaho. Marian says he's lying because she was with Stuart when he made that lure last spring. He explains that it's older than it looks and Stuart must have left it up in Idaho the last time they went fishing there. Adam politely asks to have the lure back. Marian says it's a miracle, like Stuart is trying to reach out to them to say hello. Opal thinks that is a BEAUTIFUL thought! Marian asks Adam if that's how he felt about it -- if he felt like Stuart was trying to send him a message of love. Opal urges him to stay open to it. Adam says it's a FISHING FLY, not a Valentine! If it means that much to Marian, she can keep it. He sits back down again, heavily, slumping to his left and staring into space.
TAD & DIXIE'S HOUSE
Tad rants about the article in the paper as Dixie brings him tea. He says it's a disaster -- it's like a bus accident with Italian food! [huh?] It makes the Col-Mar Tower sound like the Mir space station only more expensive. He says no one called the office for confirmation on the details [how the hell would HE know that?] Dixie says they can demand a retraction, but Tad says the details are accurate, including the cost overruns and safety violations she mentions. Tad bemoans that it's Murphy's Law and everything that can possibly go wrong is going wrong. He feels like God is punishing him for Stuart's death! Fill-in #6: They discuss how Tad is/is not responsible for Stuart's death by telling him that Adam was trying to torpedo Stuart's marriage. Tad says he was too self- righteous; he HAD to tell Stuart. Dixie insists it's ADAM'S fault, not Tad's.
Junior walks in [he IS taller] and Dixie asks what he's dressed for. He says the junior varsity tryouts are tomorrow and he wants to know if they want to come along [if it's tomorrow, why do they have to go somewhere NOW? How does a FRESHMAN get on a JUNIOR VARSITY team?] Tad says he's going to, but first he has to stop at the office and he'll meet Junior at the park later (no one mentioned the park up until that point). Dixie tells Junior she'd LOVE to go, but she has to go to work. Maybe she can get a command performance tonight [of WHAT?]. Junior is unhappy and pouts about her not being available for his every whim. Dixie feels bad and tells Junior she doesn't want her job to interfere with their lives, especially with him starting HIGH SCHOOL, and she earnestly asks him if he wants her to quit. He stares and pouts. Tad, who was leaving the room, stops and turns to stare at her. Tad returns to the couch and asks if Junior is going to make Dixie quit her job. Junior says NOT on his account. If he makes the team, he'll be practicing after school every day and be hitting the books every day as soon as he gets home. Junior tells her she doesn't have to worry any more about milk and cookies and if she likes her job, she can GO FOR IT! Tad good-naturedly teases her about her willingness to give up her job for Junior and asks if HE gets a vote. She says he doesn't need milk and cookies either. She's avoiding eye-contact, though and turns to get some water. Tad teases some more and says he doesn't want David Hayward to take advantage of her. She whips her head around: "What's THAT supposed to mean?" [A little touchy today] Tad brings up the whole Dimitri Marrick thing and she concurs in relief. [I notice at this point that she's wearing a maroon long-sleeved blouse that is fully buttoned up practically to the crease between her head and her neck. Tad, BTW, is wearing a shirt with bold, if not super wide, stripes.] Tad drops his cheery attitude and says he just doesn't want David to bring Dixie down with him when he breaks the rules. Dixie says it's okay -- now that Dimitri's secret is out, maybe she can go back to answering the phone and opening the mail -- from now on there will be BOUNDARIES. He calls her on the use of the word "boundaries" and she uncomfortably says it just means there will be restrictions to the amount of time that she spends there, that's all. Speaking of which, she has to get to work. Tad says that's too bad, because this button-down thing is really working for him all of the sudden -- it's HOT! They could stay in the house a little longer (he starts unbuttoning her blouse) -- she can pretend to be the librarian and he can be the guy whose books are weeks and weeks and weeks overdue and-- she laughs and slaps him away (having fun now). He says he likes it when she's bossy and the moment turns to how he will ALWAYS love her. Then he goes the door and stops to give her mental undressing, saying (I think): "Madronne!" Dixie smiles lovingly at his departure then frowns and rebuttons her blouse, appearing to choke on it as she does so.
MARIAN'S COTTAGE
Marian and Opal return to the cottage where Scott is making up bouquets. Marian asks if the beautiful flowers are for Becca and if they made up, but Scott says no and that the flowers are to take to Stuart's grave. Scott asks what happened to their power walk -- he thought they were going to circle Willow Lake. Apparently the large lake, including the swampy areas with patches of oatmeal- based quicksand, are now in the middle of town and easily traversed in flimsy high heels. [I paused the tape to type this and looked up to see that Marian's nipples are protruding quite a bit through her suit -- I'm telling you, they are DELIBERATELY doing that now -- it must be the new fall fashion]. Marian fills Scott in on the fishing lure find and says she's going to make a pin out of it. She tells him about a dream she had about Stuart: "He was a passenger in a truck, and he was driving by rows and rows of corn fields. And he had his head hanging out the window, and his hair was flying, and he was smiling. But, Scott, I feel that he was somehow trying to find his way home, you know, back to us. And now I find this." [So now we know -- Stuart is really LASSIE!]
Opal says that maybe it was a psychic dream and it can't be a coincidence, especially with finding that lure. Fill-in #7: "Remember what Frederick (the psychic) said? That he could not locate Stuart on the other side." She thinks Stuart is trying to send Marian a message. Marian feels like Stuart IS nearby. Opal urges her to rethink a psychic session with Frederick, using the lure. Marian turns to Scott and asks what he thinks. Opal says he might want to be there too because (fill-in #8): "Last time, Frederick contacted your mama. (to Marian) Didn't he? Remember? The whole room filled with the scent of gardenias. That was Cindy's favorite flower. Remember that, Marian?" Scott is mildly skeptical but humors Marian and says that maybe she should ask him to come by if it will make her feel better. He leaves with the flowers.
HUNTING LODGE
Alex frets about what a big deal they made about her being stepmother to Maddie and Sam. Dimitri says they will find a gentle way of telling them, if they even remember who he is. She protests that of course they will. They have to tell Gillian and Eugenia first, though -- they'll be SOOO happy! Dimitri unenthusiastically agrees and says he SOOOO tired of hiding [we're ALL tired of THAT]! Someone knocks at the door. [I'm wondering if it's an arrow-gram from Edmund]. It's a delivery-person [I was partially right] from the lab with Dimitri's medication. As the delivery-person leaves, Bianca shows up and says she thought she'd take Alex up on her offer to ride Scorpio -- it seems like the perfect afternoon (she looks up -- birds are singing, the sun is shining) -- then she sees Dimitri. She is filled with AWE and runs to him, bursting with happiness to see him. They hug and she tries not to gouge him with her helmet and riding crop. [I REALLY like the actress playing Bianca -- she's doing a FAB job!]
DAVID'S OFFICE
A volunteer from the gift shop brings in the flowers for Dixie. David has apparently had second thoughts, though, and tells her to take the card off and bring them to the nurses' station. NOW. She nods and ducks out of the room with the flowers. David turns to some files on his desk. The door is still swinging slowly shut when Edmund storms in, slamming the door open against the wall. David turns, saying "Dixie--" as Edmund grabs him by the collar and bends him backward over the desk.
After the mid-hour commercials [always LOOONGGG with an teaser tableau midway through them to make you THINK they are returning], David keeps trying to get up and Edmund keeps slamming him back down to the desk [which, for amusement, I play in fast-motion so it looks like they are humping]. Edmund shouts about David lying about Dimitri and David yells back that he HAD to because (fill-in #9) Dimitri refused to take treatment unless it was kept a secret -- it was a matter of professional ethics. Edmund asks him how ethical the phony death certificate was. David says he was trying to save his life and he SUCCEEDED! Edmund says he only did it to further his own medical career and he didn't care about Dimitri! Dixie bursts in and yells at Edmund to stop and that it wasn't like that! David yells to her not to get involved and she says she already IS involved! Edmund finally lets go and David springs up from his rather undignified position on the desk. David says he understands that Edmund is hurt by the deception, but David's conscience is clear. Edmund says he HAS no conscience. [His jaw is jutting out so far that you could use it for an ironing board] David says he did what he thought was best and if anyone is to blame, it's Dimitri. Dixie says no, if anyone is to blame, it's HER! Both men turn and scowl at her. [Edmund's eyebrows are so furrowed in fury that you could plant an orchard in them.]
HUNTING LODGE
Bianca continues to be ecstatic at Dimitri's state of living. He says he'll explain later -- first he has to gush over how much she's grown and how beautiful she is! Bianca asks if Erica knows he's alive and he says no and he would appreciate it if she didn't say anything to her for a few days so he can let his family know first. She agrees. Her face falls and she asks if Edmund knows. Dimitri says he just found out, but they have plenty of time to talk about that later, asking why she's there right now. She talks about riding Scorpio, then (fill-in #10) says she was supposed to go back to Seattle last week, but Erica has this huge party planned for her. She says she'd rather have a root canal [I don't know why people are so afraid of root canals -- they really aren't THAT bad nowadays]. She begs Dimitri to come to her party. He hesitates and says he'll let her know. She realizes she has put her foot in her mouth because she already invited Alex and EDMUND and asks if "this" is going to be okay. Alex smiles and says they'll get back to her on that.
MARIAN'S COTTAGE
Opal invites yet another Frederick [about 10 years younger/older than Frederick #1/Frederick #2, respectively] into the living room and introduces him to Scott. Pleasantries are exchanged, but Frederick senses that Scott isn't too thrilled about him being there [it really doesn't take a psychic to figure THAT out]. Frederick says Marian has a VERY strong connection with Stuart and Scott agrees. Marian enters with a tray of stuff and welcomes Frederick, apologizing for not being very receptive the last time. [She's STILL sporting headlights] She hands him the fishing lure and explains that Stuart made it and Adam found it in Idaho and thought that Stuart had made it over a year ago. Opal chimes in that they thought it might be a sign. Frederick says no. It feels new to him. Fresh emanations are coming from it [which makes me want to suggest a Kleenex or moist towelette]. He suggests they sit down to see what they can learn -- Scott is slow to respond and rolls his eyes as he watches them sit down.
PINE VALLEY PARK / WILLOW LAKE / YOSEMITE
A muscle-bound man jogs slowly past Adam (not for the first time) [his thighs are WAY too big and developed to go any faster, I suspect]. Adam tosses a cup into the nearby trash receptacle and bends to pick up a soccer ball that has rolled up. He straightens to see Junior scowling at him like an angry 2-year- old. Junior keeps looking Adam up and down contemptuously, then turns away from him (after retrieving the ball). Adam calls out to him to wait. Junior turns and continues to look at Adam as if he's a child molester. [Fade to a Maybelline commercial starring Sarah Michelle Gellar (aka Kendall) -- am I the only one who winces every time that commercial appears -- her face just looks so UNNATURAL in that commercial, especially with blonde hair!]
Adam asks if Junior would stay and talk to him for a moment. Junior reluctantly agrees. Adam pries out of him that he just returned from camp about an hour ago, but he doesn't answer when Adam asks how it was. Adam is hesitant, but really trying to connect. He asks if Junior had fun. Junior: "Like you CARE!" He says Adam never visited or called. Dixie sent him packages and faxes every week! Adam apologizes and says that even if he's not in his life anymore, it doesn't mean he doesn't care. He DOES! Junior continues to scowl with his newly honed, patented teenage look of contempt. He doesn't get it -- Adam SAYS he cares about him, but he never wants to spend time with him or do ANYTHING. Adam is truly ashamed of himself and looks away, fighting back tears. Junior relents a little and asks about Idaho and why he wasn't still there. Adam said he cut it short -- it was no fun. Junior says he thought Adam LOVED fishing -- Adam said he loved it last year when Junior and Stuart were with him. Junior smiles sadly and says he still has that picture of the 3 of them on the dock, wearing those goofy hats Stuart had given them. Adam grins and Junior says he thinks about him all the time -- constantly. He loved him. Junior asks why he doesn't try to be more like Uncle Stuart, then? Why is he so mean -- especially to his FAMILY? Adam winces in pain and seems to remember his original plan -- he says it's just him and he can't change. He's glad Junior thinks a lot about his Uncle Stuart -- he'd like Junior to think of Uncle Stuart as his father. Junior pulls back as if he's been slapped [which he has been, emotionally] and says there's something he can't figure out. Adam is always telling him not to give up, and Adam agrees, strongly saying that you HAVE to PERSEVERE in life! Junior asks why, then, did Adam give up on himself?
Tad shows up, saying he's been looking all over the park for Junior. He notices the emotional tension, apologizes and backs off a little [rather uncharacteristically], asking if everything is all right. Junior says everything is fine. Junior asks if Tad wants to see his new crossover move. Tad agrees, but asks for a minute with Adam first. He puts his hands on his hips (but not belligerently) and tells Adam that Junior just got back and that whatever happens between Tad and Adam, it's important that they agree to do what's best for Junior. Adam says that Tad's concern for HIS son is very touching. [David Canary has been doing an EXCELLENT job throughout his scenes -- after his encounter with Junior, he seems to look 10 years older] He changes the subject and says Tad must have an awful lot on his mind -- how is the new office tower coming along? Tad, still subdued, says he guesses he had that coming, but you know the old saying -- it's not how you start the race that counts, it's how you finish it. [Tad is looking grayer by the day] He says the tower will be FINE and walks away. Adam scowls [it's a SCOWLING kind of day in PV]
DAVID'S OFFICE
Edmund tells Dixie that she's not to blame. She says she is. David is not to blame -- DIMITRI is the one who wanted to keep a secret. DIXIE is the one who messed up because she couldn't keep the secret any longer. SHE'S the one who sent Alex to the Hunting Lodge -- Dimitri was going to go to Europe and start a new life and he NEVER wanted Edmund or Alex to know he was alive! David chimes in that Dimitri also forged the fake death certificate. Edmund waves it all off, saying Dimitri never intended to stay dead and he DIDN'T stay in Europe -- he just bided his time until HE felt that it was the right time to TAKE Alex back. Dixie doesn't think that's true. Edmund says he doesn't blame Dixie for all of this -- Hayward's got a history of making women do things against their will [ZING!!!] David throws up his hand and walks behind his desk. Edmund tells Dixie that if he were she, he would get out of that situation before David SUCKS her down any more! [MUST STIFLE--MMFFTT--sucking--MMFT--sweater puppies-- MMFFFTT--blue blouse--STIFLE!!!] Dixie apologizes for all the pain, but no one ever wanted him to get hurt. Isn't it better to KNOW now what he's dealing with? David (snottily): "Yeah, and whatever else, your brother is alive." David and Edmund give each other "WE'RE NOT FINISHED" challenge looks and Edmund stomps out.
Dixie shakes her head at the mess she's made of things and turns to David. She throws up her hands and tells him to go ahead and say "I told you so". He says no, he knows how much she's hurting for Edmund right now. She says it's not just Edmund -- it's a mess for everybody. David says he wishes she had never gotten involved. She says that makes two of them, but if she had to do it all over again, she would do the same thing except she wouldn't wait so long to tell everyone that Dimitri was alive. She wouldn't have listened to David. She stares at him with calm determination.
MARIAN'S COTTAGE
Frederick holds Marian's hands and the seance begins as Scott finally sits down. The camera pans around the room as Frederick starts yacking to the spirit world about Stuart. Marian is fervently trying to get into the spirit of things and is moving her mouth like a landed fish; Jill Larson is a hoot! She's got her eyes partially closed with the eyeballs rolled up in their sockets [a video capture can be see at http://www.robinc.org/amcjpgs.html] -- it's hard to know whether to laugh or throw up! Scott is just sitting there rolling his eyes and making disbelieving faces, but he IS holding Opal's hand. Frederick, in the meantime, is not getting any feedback from the other side. He feels a very strong presence in the room, but doesn't know what it is. Opal's eyes open and she looks at Frederick. Marian keeps her eyes tightly closed, but says (when asked) that she doesn't feel anything. Frederick says he MUST ask everyone in the room to keep an open heart and open mind's eye, implying that Scott is not cooperating (which is true). Scott looks pained at having to sit through this ordeal (I've seen that look on my son's face when he's trying to humor me, but can barely maintain). Stuart is trying to reach them and they MUST let him in!
HUNTING LODGE
Bianca continues to beg Dimitri to come to her party -- if he's not there, she swears she will lock herself in the bathroom! Dimitri says IF they can come, they'll be there. He asks about the ride she came for and she asks him to come with her. Alex says he's not strong enough and Bianca immediately becomes concerned for Dimitri's health. Dimitri says he's getting better every day and the next time she comes out he'll ride with her. She hugs him again and says it's a miracle he's there. He hands her her riding gear and ushers her out. She gives them another dazzling smile and leaves. Alex and Dimitri talk about how sweet she is. Dimitri says Bianca was right -- it IS a miracle that they are together now, and Edmund WILL understand in time [I picture Edmund on a horse, charging into the lodge and impaling Dimitri with a jousting pole].
DAVID'S OFFICE
David and Dixie finish their stare-off and he says he's due in surgery. He looks down at some papers and says he understands if she wants to quit after what happened with them and to just let him know so he can let the business office know so he can set up severance. Dixie tells him to look at her [isn't that what got them into trouble in the first place?] She says they both know what has come between them [besides David's raging hard-ons] -- it was that kiss, and it's not going to happen again. He nods his head and says "Understood." She says if it DOES, she'll leave. She wants him to know she thinks he's a brilliant doctor and she respects him for saving Dimitri's life. He thanks her and says that he DOES respect her and her marriage and how much she loves Tad. They both dart their eyes around the room and she leaves to do the mail.
MARIAN'S COTTAGE
Marian is trying so hard to contact Stuart that she's practically grunting, but she can't manage anything [other than a few farts]. Frederick says maybe they should try it again later. In the meantime, maybe she could gather up some of Stuart's things [you're in his HOUSE, for God's sake!] He suggests some things from Stuart's childhood that haven't been handled a lot (like the lure). She promises to do so and will call him. Opal leaves to attend to the Glamorama and Scott closes the door, all the while looking like they are missionaries he's been trying to get rid of. Marian picks up the lure and fondles it, trying not to cry. She suddenly GASPS, either from an impromptu orgasm or because she discovered that there really WAS a hook with the lure. She looks up and around ecstatically and calls for Stuart. She asks Scott if he felt it, too [Scott: "You're my STEPMOTHER!!! EWWWWWW!!!"] She says it was like a shiver just went right through her and like Stuart was just right there in the room. It's the closest she's felt to him since the day they lost him! She looks up and around in wonder.
PINE VALLEY PARK / WILLOW LAKE / YELLOWSTONE POND
Adam remembers Junior asking why he doesn't try to be more like Uncle Stuart. Why is he so mean, especially to his FAMILY? Adam leaves the park, but not before practically being run over by the muscle-bound guy jogging by again. Mr. Muscles stops at the other side of the courtyard, stretches his leg for a nanosecond, then walks away as a guy holding a fishing pole escorts Stuart in and announces that they are now in Pine Valley. Stuart is still wearing the fishing vest. Stuart thinks the place is beautiful. [The guy holding the fishing pole reminds me of the father on The Wonder Years] The guy frets about leaving Stuart there in the park and not at some particular address or with someone he knows. Stuart insists it's fine and the guy has already gone WAY out of his way to take him there. We suddenly hear ducks with lung capacities of the three tenors as Stuart marvels at what a nice place this is and, BTW, can you hear the ducks in the pond? The guy wishes him luck, hands him his pole and leaves. Stuart sits on the same bench that Adam just vacated and happily says he feels like he's almost THERE!
On the next AMC:
At the Valley Inn Dining Room Leo jauntily says to Greenlee: "You didn't like me with Becca any more than I liked you wasting your time on Ryan."
In the Chandler living room Arlene says to a scowling Adam: "You will never get over Liza! Never. You don't even want to!"
As Liza watches in horror from the doorway, Marian tells Scott: "Stuart's not dead!"
As Gillian leans against a war-torn doorway, Ryan reaches out to her and says: "Gillian --", but Gillian turns around, sees a dirty [but very pretty] man in army fatigues and says: "Jake?"
Irreverently submitted,
Robin "THE DUCKS! THE DUCKS!!!! AAAGGGGGHHHH!!!" Coutellier
Adam asks a fisherman about a lure that Stuart had made: "Where did it come from? It's just like the ones my brother used to tie." Man: "Could be around for some time now."
Walt (bait shop owner) to Stuart: "I wish you luck!" Stuart: "Ok. Maybe I won't need any luck in Pine Valley!"
Alex to Edmund re Dimitri: "He's come back to us. We should be thankful for that!" Edmund: "I should be thankful that my fiancee slept with my brother?" Alex: "He's my husband."
[NOTE: Apparently this is "catch up" day on AMC, filling in blanks for those who have been off on summer vacation or are being introduced to it during a group watch at college. There are flashbacks and explanations galore!]
DAVID'S OFFICE
David walks in and, although the automated voice mail prompts aren't apparent (most of which you can cut off anyway, if you know how), he actually used his TELEPHONE to retrieve a voice message, as opposed to the usual 70s style fake- wood-paneled 1'x8" answering machine. [WELCOME TO THE 21st CENTURY, AMC -- it's about TIME!] It's a carefully neutral message from Dixie saying she'll be late today because Tad is bringing the boys home from camp and she wants to be home to greet them [why didn't she just go get them with Tad?] David sighs and ponders the kiss he bestowed upon her (to shut her up, don't you know) and her horribly silent, lip-gritting [she nearly SWALLOWED her lips on THAT one] response. He snaps out of his reverie and calls the extension of the gift shop. He orders 2 dozen "peace" roses [probably should be "piece", but we won't quibble that just yet] for Mrs. Dixie Martin. [I noticed after his reverie that his shirt was unbuttoned quite a bit, showing a YUMMY expanse of hairy chest -- THANK YOU!]
TAD & DIXIE'S HOUSE
Dixie reads the paper and comments that something is NOT good. Tad and Junior burst in and Dixie is thrilled to see them. [NOTE: Tad said "BABY, we're home!", not "CADY" (this is from the closed-captioning)]. She comments on how much Junior has grown and asks what they fed him. He says "bug juice and peanut butter" [Junior's smile makes me think they DO remember now that he's fatally allergic to peanuts, but are just messing with us]. She sends him upstairs to unpack, and falls into Tad's arms the moment Junior leaves the room. They quickly catch up about hoping Adrian not only finds Jake, but also manage to drag him home somehow. Tad picks up the Wall Street Herald and moans about one of the lead articles "CONSTRUCTION SET-BACKS CONTINUE TO PLAGUE PINE VALLEY'S NEWEST OFFICE COMPLEX -- Behind Schedule and Over Budget COL-MAR Tower is Tarnishing the Promising Partnership of Liza Colby and Tad Martin". [Like Wall Street gives a flying f* about Tad and Liza and their office building. Unless it explodes, since when does an OFFICE BUILDING bring down a multi-billion dollar conglomerate?]
PINE VALLEY PARK
The camera pulls back as Adam, sitting on a park bench, reads off the headline and chuckles. He pulls his keys out of his pocket and Stuart's fishing lure comes along with it [unfortunately, it wasn't attached to hook at the time]. While Adam is wearing a suit, there is no tie and the top 2-3 buttons of his shirt are unbuttoned. He needs a haircut and shave. He remembers being in his office and seeing (and hearing) the vision of Stuart, telling him the fish are biting. [Second flashback in the space of 4 minutes.] As Adam snaps out of his reverie, Marian and Opal walk into the park (Adam is sitting at the entrance where everyone in Pine Valley is sure to walk by him). Marian comments on what a nice park it used to be, when you would never find bums sleeping on benches. He says he should have known it was them when the birds stopped singing :-) He tells them he was just daydreaming about Stuart before THEY ruined it. Opal says Stuart wouldn't even recognize Adam if he saw him NOW. Marian chimes in that he's really letting himself go. Adam rolls his eyes because he's now getting grooming advice from "the nightmare twins". He asks which direction they are going so he can go the other way. As he jumps up, the fishing lure falls on the ground and Marian bends to pick it up. She recognizes it as Stuart's and asks if Adam stole it.
HUNTING LODGE
Edmund stares at Alex. In tears, she reaches out to him to try to soften the blow, but he turns his back on her, facing Dimitri. He congratulates Dimitri for coming out on top again. [Alex: "Actually, *I* was on top"]. Edmund cuts off Dimitri's protest, turns back to Alex and asks how he's going to stop loving her. He walks out the door like the weight of the world is on him [it's certainly pressing down on his FACE] and gives them one more poor-pitiful-me look before he firmly closes the door. Alex is crying and horrified at how they had to hurt Edmund. Dimitri then stares at her and her reaction.
Having dutifully waited for the commercials to air, Alex races out the door with Dimitri at her heels. She yells at Edmund to wait, but Dimitri tells her to let him go. There's an off-camera fan blowing on Alex, moving her hair. She suddenly turns to Dimitri, questioning why Edmund said Dimitri ALWAYS wins. Dimitri says it's because he always HAS won, ever since they were born. Fill-in #3: We get a quick summary of Edmund being the illegitimate one; Alf, the groundskeeper beating and abusing Edmund for it; neither Edmund nor Dimitri knowing they were brothers until they were fully grown; Edmund inheriting Wildwind [didn't Dimitri GIVE it to Edmund later?]. Nothing changed anything until Maria came along. Then there were years of loneliness after she died. Edmund's falling in love with Alex was as unexpected for him as Dimitri's returning from the dead was for Alex. Alex blames herself for it happening too quickly. Fill-in #4: They were both needy and helped to bring each other back to life, in a way. Fill-in #5: Dimitri tells her he heard she and Edmund confessing their love right after Hayley & Mateo's wedding. He had just returned to PV, came to the Hunting Lodge looking for Alex and found the wedding invitation. After overhearing them, he decided it would be better for everyone if he remained "dead". Alex protests that she wishes she'd known he was there. It's not better for HER without him! Dimitri takes her in his arms and says that if he'd lost her, his life wouldn't be worth living.
PINE VALLEY PARK
Adam tells Marian he did NOT steal the lure -- he brought it back from Idaho. Marian says he's lying because she was with Stuart when he made that lure last spring. He explains that it's older than it looks and Stuart must have left it up in Idaho the last time they went fishing there. Adam politely asks to have the lure back. Marian says it's a miracle, like Stuart is trying to reach out to them to say hello. Opal thinks that is a BEAUTIFUL thought! Marian asks Adam if that's how he felt about it -- if he felt like Stuart was trying to send him a message of love. Opal urges him to stay open to it. Adam says it's a FISHING FLY, not a Valentine! If it means that much to Marian, she can keep it. He sits back down again, heavily, slumping to his left and staring into space.
TAD & DIXIE'S HOUSE
Tad rants about the article in the paper as Dixie brings him tea. He says it's a disaster -- it's like a bus accident with Italian food! [huh?] It makes the Col-Mar Tower sound like the Mir space station only more expensive. He says no one called the office for confirmation on the details [how the hell would HE know that?] Dixie says they can demand a retraction, but Tad says the details are accurate, including the cost overruns and safety violations she mentions. Tad bemoans that it's Murphy's Law and everything that can possibly go wrong is going wrong. He feels like God is punishing him for Stuart's death! Fill-in #6: They discuss how Tad is/is not responsible for Stuart's death by telling him that Adam was trying to torpedo Stuart's marriage. Tad says he was too self- righteous; he HAD to tell Stuart. Dixie insists it's ADAM'S fault, not Tad's.
Junior walks in [he IS taller] and Dixie asks what he's dressed for. He says the junior varsity tryouts are tomorrow and he wants to know if they want to come along [if it's tomorrow, why do they have to go somewhere NOW? How does a FRESHMAN get on a JUNIOR VARSITY team?] Tad says he's going to, but first he has to stop at the office and he'll meet Junior at the park later (no one mentioned the park up until that point). Dixie tells Junior she'd LOVE to go, but she has to go to work. Maybe she can get a command performance tonight [of WHAT?]. Junior is unhappy and pouts about her not being available for his every whim. Dixie feels bad and tells Junior she doesn't want her job to interfere with their lives, especially with him starting HIGH SCHOOL, and she earnestly asks him if he wants her to quit. He stares and pouts. Tad, who was leaving the room, stops and turns to stare at her. Tad returns to the couch and asks if Junior is going to make Dixie quit her job. Junior says NOT on his account. If he makes the team, he'll be practicing after school every day and be hitting the books every day as soon as he gets home. Junior tells her she doesn't have to worry any more about milk and cookies and if she likes her job, she can GO FOR IT! Tad good-naturedly teases her about her willingness to give up her job for Junior and asks if HE gets a vote. She says he doesn't need milk and cookies either. She's avoiding eye-contact, though and turns to get some water. Tad teases some more and says he doesn't want David Hayward to take advantage of her. She whips her head around: "What's THAT supposed to mean?" [A little touchy today] Tad brings up the whole Dimitri Marrick thing and she concurs in relief. [I notice at this point that she's wearing a maroon long-sleeved blouse that is fully buttoned up practically to the crease between her head and her neck. Tad, BTW, is wearing a shirt with bold, if not super wide, stripes.] Tad drops his cheery attitude and says he just doesn't want David to bring Dixie down with him when he breaks the rules. Dixie says it's okay -- now that Dimitri's secret is out, maybe she can go back to answering the phone and opening the mail -- from now on there will be BOUNDARIES. He calls her on the use of the word "boundaries" and she uncomfortably says it just means there will be restrictions to the amount of time that she spends there, that's all. Speaking of which, she has to get to work. Tad says that's too bad, because this button-down thing is really working for him all of the sudden -- it's HOT! They could stay in the house a little longer (he starts unbuttoning her blouse) -- she can pretend to be the librarian and he can be the guy whose books are weeks and weeks and weeks overdue and-- she laughs and slaps him away (having fun now). He says he likes it when she's bossy and the moment turns to how he will ALWAYS love her. Then he goes the door and stops to give her mental undressing, saying (I think): "Madronne!" Dixie smiles lovingly at his departure then frowns and rebuttons her blouse, appearing to choke on it as she does so.
MARIAN'S COTTAGE
Marian and Opal return to the cottage where Scott is making up bouquets. Marian asks if the beautiful flowers are for Becca and if they made up, but Scott says no and that the flowers are to take to Stuart's grave. Scott asks what happened to their power walk -- he thought they were going to circle Willow Lake. Apparently the large lake, including the swampy areas with patches of oatmeal- based quicksand, are now in the middle of town and easily traversed in flimsy high heels. [I paused the tape to type this and looked up to see that Marian's nipples are protruding quite a bit through her suit -- I'm telling you, they are DELIBERATELY doing that now -- it must be the new fall fashion]. Marian fills Scott in on the fishing lure find and says she's going to make a pin out of it. She tells him about a dream she had about Stuart: "He was a passenger in a truck, and he was driving by rows and rows of corn fields. And he had his head hanging out the window, and his hair was flying, and he was smiling. But, Scott, I feel that he was somehow trying to find his way home, you know, back to us. And now I find this." [So now we know -- Stuart is really LASSIE!]
Opal says that maybe it was a psychic dream and it can't be a coincidence, especially with finding that lure. Fill-in #7: "Remember what Frederick (the psychic) said? That he could not locate Stuart on the other side." She thinks Stuart is trying to send Marian a message. Marian feels like Stuart IS nearby. Opal urges her to rethink a psychic session with Frederick, using the lure. Marian turns to Scott and asks what he thinks. Opal says he might want to be there too because (fill-in #8): "Last time, Frederick contacted your mama. (to Marian) Didn't he? Remember? The whole room filled with the scent of gardenias. That was Cindy's favorite flower. Remember that, Marian?" Scott is mildly skeptical but humors Marian and says that maybe she should ask him to come by if it will make her feel better. He leaves with the flowers.
HUNTING LODGE
Alex frets about what a big deal they made about her being stepmother to Maddie and Sam. Dimitri says they will find a gentle way of telling them, if they even remember who he is. She protests that of course they will. They have to tell Gillian and Eugenia first, though -- they'll be SOOO happy! Dimitri unenthusiastically agrees and says he SOOOO tired of hiding [we're ALL tired of THAT]! Someone knocks at the door. [I'm wondering if it's an arrow-gram from Edmund]. It's a delivery-person [I was partially right] from the lab with Dimitri's medication. As the delivery-person leaves, Bianca shows up and says she thought she'd take Alex up on her offer to ride Scorpio -- it seems like the perfect afternoon (she looks up -- birds are singing, the sun is shining) -- then she sees Dimitri. She is filled with AWE and runs to him, bursting with happiness to see him. They hug and she tries not to gouge him with her helmet and riding crop. [I REALLY like the actress playing Bianca -- she's doing a FAB job!]
DAVID'S OFFICE
A volunteer from the gift shop brings in the flowers for Dixie. David has apparently had second thoughts, though, and tells her to take the card off and bring them to the nurses' station. NOW. She nods and ducks out of the room with the flowers. David turns to some files on his desk. The door is still swinging slowly shut when Edmund storms in, slamming the door open against the wall. David turns, saying "Dixie--" as Edmund grabs him by the collar and bends him backward over the desk.
After the mid-hour commercials [always LOOONGGG with an teaser tableau midway through them to make you THINK they are returning], David keeps trying to get up and Edmund keeps slamming him back down to the desk [which, for amusement, I play in fast-motion so it looks like they are humping]. Edmund shouts about David lying about Dimitri and David yells back that he HAD to because (fill-in #9) Dimitri refused to take treatment unless it was kept a secret -- it was a matter of professional ethics. Edmund asks him how ethical the phony death certificate was. David says he was trying to save his life and he SUCCEEDED! Edmund says he only did it to further his own medical career and he didn't care about Dimitri! Dixie bursts in and yells at Edmund to stop and that it wasn't like that! David yells to her not to get involved and she says she already IS involved! Edmund finally lets go and David springs up from his rather undignified position on the desk. David says he understands that Edmund is hurt by the deception, but David's conscience is clear. Edmund says he HAS no conscience. [His jaw is jutting out so far that you could use it for an ironing board] David says he did what he thought was best and if anyone is to blame, it's Dimitri. Dixie says no, if anyone is to blame, it's HER! Both men turn and scowl at her. [Edmund's eyebrows are so furrowed in fury that you could plant an orchard in them.]
HUNTING LODGE
Bianca continues to be ecstatic at Dimitri's state of living. He says he'll explain later -- first he has to gush over how much she's grown and how beautiful she is! Bianca asks if Erica knows he's alive and he says no and he would appreciate it if she didn't say anything to her for a few days so he can let his family know first. She agrees. Her face falls and she asks if Edmund knows. Dimitri says he just found out, but they have plenty of time to talk about that later, asking why she's there right now. She talks about riding Scorpio, then (fill-in #10) says she was supposed to go back to Seattle last week, but Erica has this huge party planned for her. She says she'd rather have a root canal [I don't know why people are so afraid of root canals -- they really aren't THAT bad nowadays]. She begs Dimitri to come to her party. He hesitates and says he'll let her know. She realizes she has put her foot in her mouth because she already invited Alex and EDMUND and asks if "this" is going to be okay. Alex smiles and says they'll get back to her on that.
MARIAN'S COTTAGE
Opal invites yet another Frederick [about 10 years younger/older than Frederick #1/Frederick #2, respectively] into the living room and introduces him to Scott. Pleasantries are exchanged, but Frederick senses that Scott isn't too thrilled about him being there [it really doesn't take a psychic to figure THAT out]. Frederick says Marian has a VERY strong connection with Stuart and Scott agrees. Marian enters with a tray of stuff and welcomes Frederick, apologizing for not being very receptive the last time. [She's STILL sporting headlights] She hands him the fishing lure and explains that Stuart made it and Adam found it in Idaho and thought that Stuart had made it over a year ago. Opal chimes in that they thought it might be a sign. Frederick says no. It feels new to him. Fresh emanations are coming from it [which makes me want to suggest a Kleenex or moist towelette]. He suggests they sit down to see what they can learn -- Scott is slow to respond and rolls his eyes as he watches them sit down.
PINE VALLEY PARK / WILLOW LAKE / YOSEMITE
A muscle-bound man jogs slowly past Adam (not for the first time) [his thighs are WAY too big and developed to go any faster, I suspect]. Adam tosses a cup into the nearby trash receptacle and bends to pick up a soccer ball that has rolled up. He straightens to see Junior scowling at him like an angry 2-year- old. Junior keeps looking Adam up and down contemptuously, then turns away from him (after retrieving the ball). Adam calls out to him to wait. Junior turns and continues to look at Adam as if he's a child molester. [Fade to a Maybelline commercial starring Sarah Michelle Gellar (aka Kendall) -- am I the only one who winces every time that commercial appears -- her face just looks so UNNATURAL in that commercial, especially with blonde hair!]
Adam asks if Junior would stay and talk to him for a moment. Junior reluctantly agrees. Adam pries out of him that he just returned from camp about an hour ago, but he doesn't answer when Adam asks how it was. Adam is hesitant, but really trying to connect. He asks if Junior had fun. Junior: "Like you CARE!" He says Adam never visited or called. Dixie sent him packages and faxes every week! Adam apologizes and says that even if he's not in his life anymore, it doesn't mean he doesn't care. He DOES! Junior continues to scowl with his newly honed, patented teenage look of contempt. He doesn't get it -- Adam SAYS he cares about him, but he never wants to spend time with him or do ANYTHING. Adam is truly ashamed of himself and looks away, fighting back tears. Junior relents a little and asks about Idaho and why he wasn't still there. Adam said he cut it short -- it was no fun. Junior says he thought Adam LOVED fishing -- Adam said he loved it last year when Junior and Stuart were with him. Junior smiles sadly and says he still has that picture of the 3 of them on the dock, wearing those goofy hats Stuart had given them. Adam grins and Junior says he thinks about him all the time -- constantly. He loved him. Junior asks why he doesn't try to be more like Uncle Stuart, then? Why is he so mean -- especially to his FAMILY? Adam winces in pain and seems to remember his original plan -- he says it's just him and he can't change. He's glad Junior thinks a lot about his Uncle Stuart -- he'd like Junior to think of Uncle Stuart as his father. Junior pulls back as if he's been slapped [which he has been, emotionally] and says there's something he can't figure out. Adam is always telling him not to give up, and Adam agrees, strongly saying that you HAVE to PERSEVERE in life! Junior asks why, then, did Adam give up on himself?
Tad shows up, saying he's been looking all over the park for Junior. He notices the emotional tension, apologizes and backs off a little [rather uncharacteristically], asking if everything is all right. Junior says everything is fine. Junior asks if Tad wants to see his new crossover move. Tad agrees, but asks for a minute with Adam first. He puts his hands on his hips (but not belligerently) and tells Adam that Junior just got back and that whatever happens between Tad and Adam, it's important that they agree to do what's best for Junior. Adam says that Tad's concern for HIS son is very touching. [David Canary has been doing an EXCELLENT job throughout his scenes -- after his encounter with Junior, he seems to look 10 years older] He changes the subject and says Tad must have an awful lot on his mind -- how is the new office tower coming along? Tad, still subdued, says he guesses he had that coming, but you know the old saying -- it's not how you start the race that counts, it's how you finish it. [Tad is looking grayer by the day] He says the tower will be FINE and walks away. Adam scowls [it's a SCOWLING kind of day in PV]
DAVID'S OFFICE
Edmund tells Dixie that she's not to blame. She says she is. David is not to blame -- DIMITRI is the one who wanted to keep a secret. DIXIE is the one who messed up because she couldn't keep the secret any longer. SHE'S the one who sent Alex to the Hunting Lodge -- Dimitri was going to go to Europe and start a new life and he NEVER wanted Edmund or Alex to know he was alive! David chimes in that Dimitri also forged the fake death certificate. Edmund waves it all off, saying Dimitri never intended to stay dead and he DIDN'T stay in Europe -- he just bided his time until HE felt that it was the right time to TAKE Alex back. Dixie doesn't think that's true. Edmund says he doesn't blame Dixie for all of this -- Hayward's got a history of making women do things against their will [ZING!!!] David throws up his hand and walks behind his desk. Edmund tells Dixie that if he were she, he would get out of that situation before David SUCKS her down any more! [MUST STIFLE--MMFFTT--sucking--MMFT--sweater puppies-- MMFFFTT--blue blouse--STIFLE!!!] Dixie apologizes for all the pain, but no one ever wanted him to get hurt. Isn't it better to KNOW now what he's dealing with? David (snottily): "Yeah, and whatever else, your brother is alive." David and Edmund give each other "WE'RE NOT FINISHED" challenge looks and Edmund stomps out.
Dixie shakes her head at the mess she's made of things and turns to David. She throws up her hands and tells him to go ahead and say "I told you so". He says no, he knows how much she's hurting for Edmund right now. She says it's not just Edmund -- it's a mess for everybody. David says he wishes she had never gotten involved. She says that makes two of them, but if she had to do it all over again, she would do the same thing except she wouldn't wait so long to tell everyone that Dimitri was alive. She wouldn't have listened to David. She stares at him with calm determination.
MARIAN'S COTTAGE
Frederick holds Marian's hands and the seance begins as Scott finally sits down. The camera pans around the room as Frederick starts yacking to the spirit world about Stuart. Marian is fervently trying to get into the spirit of things and is moving her mouth like a landed fish; Jill Larson is a hoot! She's got her eyes partially closed with the eyeballs rolled up in their sockets [a video capture can be see at http://www.robinc.org/amcjpgs.html] -- it's hard to know whether to laugh or throw up! Scott is just sitting there rolling his eyes and making disbelieving faces, but he IS holding Opal's hand. Frederick, in the meantime, is not getting any feedback from the other side. He feels a very strong presence in the room, but doesn't know what it is. Opal's eyes open and she looks at Frederick. Marian keeps her eyes tightly closed, but says (when asked) that she doesn't feel anything. Frederick says he MUST ask everyone in the room to keep an open heart and open mind's eye, implying that Scott is not cooperating (which is true). Scott looks pained at having to sit through this ordeal (I've seen that look on my son's face when he's trying to humor me, but can barely maintain). Stuart is trying to reach them and they MUST let him in!
HUNTING LODGE
Bianca continues to beg Dimitri to come to her party -- if he's not there, she swears she will lock herself in the bathroom! Dimitri says IF they can come, they'll be there. He asks about the ride she came for and she asks him to come with her. Alex says he's not strong enough and Bianca immediately becomes concerned for Dimitri's health. Dimitri says he's getting better every day and the next time she comes out he'll ride with her. She hugs him again and says it's a miracle he's there. He hands her her riding gear and ushers her out. She gives them another dazzling smile and leaves. Alex and Dimitri talk about how sweet she is. Dimitri says Bianca was right -- it IS a miracle that they are together now, and Edmund WILL understand in time [I picture Edmund on a horse, charging into the lodge and impaling Dimitri with a jousting pole].
DAVID'S OFFICE
David and Dixie finish their stare-off and he says he's due in surgery. He looks down at some papers and says he understands if she wants to quit after what happened with them and to just let him know so he can let the business office know so he can set up severance. Dixie tells him to look at her [isn't that what got them into trouble in the first place?] She says they both know what has come between them [besides David's raging hard-ons] -- it was that kiss, and it's not going to happen again. He nods his head and says "Understood." She says if it DOES, she'll leave. She wants him to know she thinks he's a brilliant doctor and she respects him for saving Dimitri's life. He thanks her and says that he DOES respect her and her marriage and how much she loves Tad. They both dart their eyes around the room and she leaves to do the mail.
MARIAN'S COTTAGE
Marian is trying so hard to contact Stuart that she's practically grunting, but she can't manage anything [other than a few farts]. Frederick says maybe they should try it again later. In the meantime, maybe she could gather up some of Stuart's things [you're in his HOUSE, for God's sake!] He suggests some things from Stuart's childhood that haven't been handled a lot (like the lure). She promises to do so and will call him. Opal leaves to attend to the Glamorama and Scott closes the door, all the while looking like they are missionaries he's been trying to get rid of. Marian picks up the lure and fondles it, trying not to cry. She suddenly GASPS, either from an impromptu orgasm or because she discovered that there really WAS a hook with the lure. She looks up and around ecstatically and calls for Stuart. She asks Scott if he felt it, too [Scott: "You're my STEPMOTHER!!! EWWWWWW!!!"] She says it was like a shiver just went right through her and like Stuart was just right there in the room. It's the closest she's felt to him since the day they lost him! She looks up and around in wonder.
PINE VALLEY PARK / WILLOW LAKE / YELLOWSTONE POND
Adam remembers Junior asking why he doesn't try to be more like Uncle Stuart. Why is he so mean, especially to his FAMILY? Adam leaves the park, but not before practically being run over by the muscle-bound guy jogging by again. Mr. Muscles stops at the other side of the courtyard, stretches his leg for a nanosecond, then walks away as a guy holding a fishing pole escorts Stuart in and announces that they are now in Pine Valley. Stuart is still wearing the fishing vest. Stuart thinks the place is beautiful. [The guy holding the fishing pole reminds me of the father on The Wonder Years] The guy frets about leaving Stuart there in the park and not at some particular address or with someone he knows. Stuart insists it's fine and the guy has already gone WAY out of his way to take him there. We suddenly hear ducks with lung capacities of the three tenors as Stuart marvels at what a nice place this is and, BTW, can you hear the ducks in the pond? The guy wishes him luck, hands him his pole and leaves. Stuart sits on the same bench that Adam just vacated and happily says he feels like he's almost THERE!
On the next AMC:
At the Valley Inn Dining Room Leo jauntily says to Greenlee: "You didn't like me with Becca any more than I liked you wasting your time on Ryan."
In the Chandler living room Arlene says to a scowling Adam: "You will never get over Liza! Never. You don't even want to!"
As Liza watches in horror from the doorway, Marian tells Scott: "Stuart's not dead!"
As Gillian leans against a war-torn doorway, Ryan reaches out to her and says: "Gillian --", but Gillian turns around, sees a dirty [but very pretty] man in army fatigues and says: "Jake?"
Irreverently submitted,
Robin "THE DUCKS! THE DUCKS!!!! AAAGGGGGHHHH!!!" Coutellier
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